I need a good put-down
my boss thinks she can hum, not sing, but hum to anything that's on the radio. Its terrible and out of tune. I need a good put-down, but one that doesn't get me sacked etc.
( Ya What Skiddlyboop, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 16:29, 11 replies)

Hand her a bucket
When she asks what it's for tell her it's to carry the tune, 'cos she can't do it vocally.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 16:31, closed)

Ask her if she's training for a kareoke night.
When she says no, say, "No, I thought not."

It could be that she's not aware she's doing it.
(Sivvus trolley collision in the fruit aisle led to a jam, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 16:42, closed)

i think that is the case, she does have a good sense of humour, but this is tied in with the fact that she's a woman, so would probably take anything i say with a bit too much sensitivity...

maybe i should just badly sing louder? then i could say i was just joining in with her?
( Ya What Skiddlyboop, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 16:47, closed)

Just close the kitchen door, you won't be able to hear her then.
Hahahahahahahahahahaha /sarcasm
(anonymousreality tickled your fancy on, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 16:52, closed)

Just say, 'did you know you were humming?"
Generally if people do it absentmindedly, drawing attention to it will make them realise they're doing it enough to stop for a while.

EDIT: And can I just roll your eyes at the woman comment? I hope you meant it sarcastically. ;)
(Sivvus trolley collision in the fruit aisle led to a jam, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 16:59, closed)

"Christ, marathon runner's trainers don't hum that bad"

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 17:03, closed)

"Christ, my mother-in-law's minge doesn't hum that bad."

( argyleblanket The man on the roof works for me, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 19:29, closed)

How about telling her
the only thing that hums worse than her took two flushes and a poke with the bog brush?
(Ruffgeezer back again like a bad smell., Fri 25 Nov 2011, 18:41, closed)

^^ this is the one!!

(SausageWarrior destination Zululand, come on boys jump in the van, Sat 26 Nov 2011, 19:24, closed)

Every time she starts doing it
you should start loudly humming "Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm" by the Crash Test Dummies.
(Land of Green Ginger It's dreamy weather, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 19:46, closed)

If you get desperate, theres always the old classic: "You should be on the radio..... I can switch that off"
(Freakmandu, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 21:48, closed)