...
Our ref. AB 4562
Your ref. DH 45


February 2nd, 2012


Dear Mr. ****,

You have been identified from university photographic records as being the man seen by CCTV cameras urinating from the open window of a minibus with registration XXX XXXX, property of **** University, on the westbound carriageway of the M8 at 0058 on Tuesday January 30th contrary to the Sexual Offences Act (2003). A preliminary hearing has been provisionally set for 9.45am in room 6b of Edinburgh Magistrates’ Court on May 8th 2012. To discuss the date or time of this hearing, please call Lothian and Borders Police (judiciary dept.) on 020 7622 3626.



Yours Faithfully,




Sgt. Andy McRae
Lothian and Borders Police





The phone number will put him through to Battersea dogs' home. Nobody does that when I'm driving.
( MatJ LOOK, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 1:00, 9 replies)

I couldn't work out
how the hell you knew it was 'Mr. X' if you were in another car that had been pissed on. Then I twigged. Bravo, sir, I do like it!
( Bats, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 6:22, closed)

twigged?
I haven't yet. But I like this - click!
(justin(e), Sun 19 Feb 2012, 4:45, closed)

Nice.
Although I am tempted to ask what sort of moron wouldn't know that 020 7XX is a London number.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 8:57, closed)

Oh dear...
I can see this starting off the whole '0207' versus '020 7' London area code debate again ;)
( snee held his breath since, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 9:26, closed)

There is no debate.
It's 020 7XXX

And with that, I am steering clear of these replies now, before all the people who are wrong get involved.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 9:30, closed)

Yours sincerely, not faithfully.
As you're addressing him by name.

Otherwise, good work. :)
( Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 9:55, closed)

No magistrates' court in Edinburgh
Just a Sheriff Court and a JP Court.
(ubergeekian, Fri 17 Feb 2012, 14:08, closed)

And the High Court the District Court the Court of the Lord Lyon and a bunch of other ornate pish what with it still being the capital especially as far as thousand year old dressing up bollocks is concerned.
(Benzyl, Tue 21 Feb 2012, 21:37, closed)

this
b3ta.com/links/coffee_aint_it
( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Sat 18 Feb 2012, 0:24, closed)