Chip shop chaos
Oh it sounded simple enough to run around to the chippy for the family. Being fourteen ment being the lackey, so with a crisp twenty in my hand i rushed through the rain.The door was open and the shop was almost empty , no customers or employees.

One pidgeon stood alone helping itself to the spinning kebab meat.
Before i could cry out "theres a pidgeon" Someone came out the back and shouted "theres a pidgeon!".
Obviously startled the pidgeon flew away , straight towards me
I ducked and it flew over my head and straight into the glass paned door i just closed. Three times it tried leaving a bloody stain.
Tranfixed we were watching this display of mad fowl suicide.

The door was then renched open from the other side by a pensioner clad in a plastic hood followed by no less then six other old ladies dressed the same.
Cue feathery, plastic, umbrella carnage as the pidgeon tried to escape through the wrinkly talcum powdered mass. After it had made its way out it plowed itself into a parked car and dropped dead. (i didn't check but it safe to assume it had stopped moving for a reason)

Anyway thats how i got free dinner for the family for keeping my gob shut , they binned the kebab meat regardless, and i kept the twenty.

Length ? Oh about two minutes from sneaky meaty snack to horrendous death.
(shake'n'bake Tally Ho, Biatch!, Thu 21 Apr 2011, 17:23, 2 replies)

Pigeon

(Nigella Pussycat picking baked-in hair from creme brulee, Fri 22 Apr 2011, 13:02, closed)

Pidgeon

(Lord Potato, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 0:56, closed)