I live close to
an old psychiatric asylum. It's mostly close now but the older residents are kept there til their dying days. Now it's not your regular strait jacket asylum, the residents can walk around and do as they like and are mostly harmless.

One particular resident by the name of Tony had become a particular pest in my friends shop hanging around and generally how much is this for every item. He is also a bit of a perve and has harassed young men always looking for a sticky handshake. Being a true capitalist altruist my friend let Tony hang round so long as he was buying.

One particular day Tony comes into the shop looking more than a bit worried. "Joe, Joe, am I going to hell Joe?". Joe perplexed asks why Tony would think he's going to hell? "The Nurses said I'm going to hell Joe".

Joe asks why they would say such a thing? Tony looks guilty for a second then mumbles "I was touching meself Joe...". Initially shocked Joe feels sorry for Tony and says thats its ok and that you don't go to hell for that. Tony then looks Joe square in the eye and says "I think of you when I do it Joe".

Lest to say Joe was shocked but not as shocked when Joe starting screaming "You're gonna burn Tony! You're gonna burn!" as Tony ran from the shop. One weeks barring for him.
( dazbrilliantwhites has been meaning to change this..., Sat 23 Apr 2011, 11:18, 1 reply)

"You're gonna burn Tony!"
Clicking hell. Fabulous.
( number5 has been fighting tramps and losing., Sat 23 Apr 2011, 16:32, closed)