Hmm why
I have a number of reasons why the relationship failed.

1. He was a bit of a celebrity and had come from a wealthy family so he always was away mingling with people or photographed flirting with women much better looking than me. Naturally I was bound to get a little jealous.

2. The mood swings, when he wasn’t looking like an airhead in front of the press he could go from charming to broody in the company of certain mates of his.

3. The anger was also an issue, he never raised a hand to me but I once saw him beat the living crap out of a bloke who was dancing with me (True I wasn’t too happy with the creep who was swinging me round but he really did a number on the poor sod).

4. The lack of time we actually managed to spend together he was either out most nights (I think we only managed to see him a number of times in our last month together).

5. The issue he had with his parents, Jesus the number of times he went on about his mum and dad really did start to grate on me, maybe I’m just a little jealous because I am not really close to my folks (They hated their daughter working for a newspaper)

6. The kinky shit he was into. Man I thought that I was a bit risqué but this guy really went to town on the whole PVC stuff and not just in the bedroom!

Better leave it for that now as he probably will find out about this and be pissed. He is the world’s greatest detective you know.Love Vicki Vale
(mon bison powered by magnets, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:16, 3 replies)

ffs.
Didn't catch it until the last line.

Nicely done.
( Wanderer, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 15:20, closed)

The world's greatest detective?
But those descriptions doesn't sound like Monk.
( Ghoti Fingers, Tue 26 Oct 2010, 19:10, closed)

Bravo, sir
Bravo
( Spunk Murphy Tchaikovsky is a synonym for fanny, apparently, Wed 27 Oct 2010, 0:52, closed)