School AssembliesOur school assemblies were often presided over by the local vicar, who once warned us of the dreadful dangers of mixing with "Rods and Mockers". One of the cool teachers laughed. Tell us about mad headteachers and assemblies gone wrong.
Inspired by the mighty @Rhodri on Twitter
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 13 Jun 2013, 12:43)
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Oh this is going back some timeWe were all called to our national school hall for some very important bullcrap that us as 8 year olds could not give the slightest of fucks for. Everyone looking ahead as the principal waffled on and on, and then he paused.
It was at this moment that whatever was sitting in my bowels decided to make itself heard and the wettest sloppiest pfffffffffffffffffffffffftTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT seeped out of my rear. Every single kid and teacher heard it. Silent but deadly? Nope, it was like a thunder clap.
The teachers bit their lips, the kids however couldn't and once one started giggling it just kept spreading till eventually everyone was pissing themselves*.
To top it all off the enraged principal picked one lad who was a few rows behind and demanded to know what was funny to which he replied, "well sir, its just the fact that someone farted". Cue hysterics from the kids and a fuming principal who could do nothing as technically he was right. Fair play rubber!
*figure of speech
(, Thu 13 Jun 2013, 16:26, 1 reply)
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