The school bike
was sat next to me during French. Her greasy hair was tied back tight, stretching her face and making her resemble a long-nosed, startled cat. She wore an inch of makeup, a black bra under her white shirt and smelt like she'd used half a can of impulse body spray.

She scratched at the pale white stain on her blazer sleeve, sniffed it, then still unable to tell what the stain was gave it a slight lick. "Yeah" she muttered to herself, "it's definitely spunk."
( wanderlust, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 19:51, 11 replies)

Fantastic!
*clicks*
( Cawl, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 19:54, closed)

Ohmigod
That is the most disgusting, brilliant and hilarious thing I've ever read. I haven't laughed this much at a QOTW for a long time.
(Martin1337 was trying and failing to be funny at, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 20:16, closed)

Yup!
Definitely knew lasses like this at school.

*clicks*

It was never my spunk though *sighs*
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 20:35, closed)

Ew!
.
( girlinthehole, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 20:40, closed)

Ah...
Anybody can tell spunk when they taste it, but I'd be impressed if she could tell to which gentleman the emission originated from.

Oh, and *click*
(I Was a Teenage Spaceship, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 20:45, closed)

my friend sam
did something similar on our 2 weeks in kavos post-a-levels. one night i'd been walking on the beach with some guy, and sam had been doing a whole lot more with his mate. we met up at about 7am heading back to the flat, and decided to go for breakfast before the other 9 girls got up.

i was walking back to the table and nearly dropped the chips and coke (healthy and nutritious) when sam pulled her dress away from herself and groaned: "oh no...... i've got spunk all over sarah's dress....."

an advert for swallowing, i guess.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 20:46, closed)

@ Dick North
In a similar vein, my ex housemate at uni, during a competition to see who had been the dirtiest for the previous six months showed me a pillow decorated with the various vaginal secretions from four different ladies.

And he could identify which one was from whom.

Dirty cunt.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 20:48, closed)

Should that not be
dirty cunts?
( wanderlust, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 20:50, closed)

Hmmm
Presumably they did wash, it was his lack of hygiene that made the ladies look bad.

I can only assume he told them, "Look, it would really turn me on if you rubbed your naughty flaps with this pillow."
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 20:53, closed)

Ahhh well that explains it all!
I've never been able to resist when someone's said that to me.
( wanderlust, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 20:59, closed)

Now that is a talent
I am not sure whether I should boke or applaud.
(I Was a Teenage Spaceship, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 20:52, closed)