Tally ho! Chocks away!
In my school days I was in the Combined Cadet Force (where the Ministry of Defence funds school kids to play soldiers), in the Royal Air Force section.

In order to progress up the ranks, we had to pass some exams and do a project on something related to the Air Force. (unlike the army, who simply had to stick around long enough. Or the Navy. Um... yeah)

I decided to do a project on aircraft recognition. I detailed ways of recognising aircraft, the history of aircraft recognition etc.

Fortunately, what my commanders never realised is that I had (and still have) no fecking clue how to tell the difference between most aircraft. Dunno why, they all look roughly the same to me; big lumps of grey steel with some wings here and there.

This came to a head when I did some work experience at the RAF museum in Colindale. I was working with the maintenance man for the aircraft, and we pottered about cleaning oil leaks and climbing all over the planes for a week. We were in the WWII aircraft section, and John pointed to a plane;

"Recognise that one?" he asked me

Ah, buggery. I knew it was either a Spitfire or a Hurricane.

"Yeah, that's a Spitfire" I guessed

"Yup! You know, some people can't even tell the difference. Morons..."

I'm fairly sure if I was ever in an anti-aircraft unit I'd either have to shoot nothing (like the French) or shoot everything (like the Americans).
(tarbin tarbis, tarbit, tarbamus, tarbimus, tarbant, Sun 16 Aug 2009, 13:30, 4 replies)

I was in the fucking Navy.
OK, it was gay. But it was a choice of sailing in dinghies every week, or marching up and down with some cunt shouting at you.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Mon 17 Aug 2009, 0:52, closed)

Ah well, you see the normal Navy is perfectly straight
But it's the fucking Navy where's all them gayers be at.
(tarbin tarbis, tarbit, tarbamus, tarbimus, tarbant, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 13:49, closed)

I was in the RAF Section too
We got to fly Chipmunks about twice a term. Which was nice.
(Vice Admiral Sir Charles Cockbrush KCB MBE DSO, who is finding it increasingly difficult to log into b3ta.com wants to duck your aunt and kick your puppy, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 15:28, closed)

I was in the TA and really admire the Air cadets.
The Army cadets were always seen as theiving little bastards, we didn't really see much of the Sea Cadets (being based in Derby), but the Air Cadets were awesome on parades.

My first Rememberance parade went like so;

We'd all stumble out of our minibuses and casually get in position (we were out of view from the public eye to start and already knew where we stood) and then the AC turned up from the building in front of us...tap, tap, tap "left wheel!" tap, tap, tap, "Halt!" BANG! "left turn!" BANG! blah, blah, blah order of height blah blah!" tap, tap, tap, tap BANG! "ONE!TWO!THREE!FOUR!!!"etc,

Ok, *gulp* no pressure...
(suicidalducky has too much time on his hands, Mon 17 Aug 2009, 20:08, closed)