My sex misconceptions
Freddy Woo writes, "aged eight, a boy from my class told me everything these was to know about sex: male prostitutes are called destitutes and women use tampons to stop men sticking their willies up them. Also, women pee out their bums, something I didn't realise was wrong until I was about 18 and my first girlfriend looked at me aghast."
Share everything - Uncle B3ta wants to know.
zero points for conception/misconception jokes
( , Thu 25 Sep 2008, 15:54)
Freddy Woo writes, "aged eight, a boy from my class told me everything these was to know about sex: male prostitutes are called destitutes and women use tampons to stop men sticking their willies up them. Also, women pee out their bums, something I didn't realise was wrong until I was about 18 and my first girlfriend looked at me aghast."
Share everything - Uncle B3ta wants to know.
zero points for conception/misconception jokes
( , Thu 25 Sep 2008, 15:54)
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urgh
I was mentally suppressing this until just a moment ago. Thanks a lot. When I was about 13, my dad came home drunk late one night and decided it was time for "the talk". It would have amazed him to learn that I already knew quite a bit about it, most of my information being gleaned from his substantial collection of porn mags and videos but I didn't want to break the old man's heart and let him carry on trying to explain it. I won't go into great detail but it involved some grotesque parody of a sex-ed lesson, one of the highlights being "the man in the boat" and how women can have cocks too if you know where to look. I thought, with much mirth at the time, he was obviously talking about the clitoris, turns out not to be the case and after about half an hour of chat about "cream and foamy cocks" I faked a yawn and told him we should continue some other time. He got the hint and stumbled out, still muttering nonsensicle phrases to himself. As I drifted off chuckling I wondered if he'd been into she-males and gotten the wrong idea... then I felt a little sick.
Yes, I'm ashamed to admit it, at 13, I already knew more about sex than my own father. How I was even conceived I'll never fathom.
( , Thu 25 Sep 2008, 20:58, 3 replies)
I was mentally suppressing this until just a moment ago. Thanks a lot. When I was about 13, my dad came home drunk late one night and decided it was time for "the talk". It would have amazed him to learn that I already knew quite a bit about it, most of my information being gleaned from his substantial collection of porn mags and videos but I didn't want to break the old man's heart and let him carry on trying to explain it. I won't go into great detail but it involved some grotesque parody of a sex-ed lesson, one of the highlights being "the man in the boat" and how women can have cocks too if you know where to look. I thought, with much mirth at the time, he was obviously talking about the clitoris, turns out not to be the case and after about half an hour of chat about "cream and foamy cocks" I faked a yawn and told him we should continue some other time. He got the hint and stumbled out, still muttering nonsensicle phrases to himself. As I drifted off chuckling I wondered if he'd been into she-males and gotten the wrong idea... then I felt a little sick.
Yes, I'm ashamed to admit it, at 13, I already knew more about sex than my own father. How I was even conceived I'll never fathom.
( , Thu 25 Sep 2008, 20:58, 3 replies)
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