Well, when the big hand is at....




Many years ago, when I was on the dole I lived in a big old house full of my fellow work-dodgers. We used to stay up all night watching videos and smoking dope for want of anything better to do.

I woke up one day and suddenly realised I had only thirty minutes to get to the dole office to sign on for that week before it closed for the day. "Fuck it!" I thought "We must have all slept through the entire morning and afternoon". At the time, you signed a piece of paper at one hatch and then took it to another where your weekly allowance would be paid into your hot little hand. So, no signing, equals no money equals no rent, no food, no beer, no dope, no videos for the week equals eeeek!

I ran from room to room, dragging my housemates out of bed to tell them the dire news. Two got up immediately and got dressed, the other two stayed put and told me to fuck off. "You'll be sorry losers!" I shouted as I opened the front door and bolted down the street. It was then that I noticed I was still wearing a pair of tartan slippers but decided I hadn't time to get changed and carried on. I also noticed that, for a midweek afternoon, the streets were rather quiet but I was too worried about making the dole office.

It was about then that one of my housemates asked me if we'd make it in time. "I dunno" says I, peering at my watch "Look, it's already quarter to.... seven.... in the morning..... err......."

They took it in good grace really as I'd tried to make sure they didn't miss their signing on time. The funniest bit is, as we headed back home, we met one of the 'stay behinds' who'd had second thoughts and made a run for it as well.
(Fanta Menace Is tall enough to see over the fence, Thu 23 Aug 2007, 16:58, Reply)