My First Smoke, Pt. 3
This is my third (probably final) story of smoking, and the one I most fondly remember, although it still feels a little stupid, nevertheless.

WARNING, long fucker ahead!

I will point out that I have smoked socially for the past few years (raising the ire of both full-blooded smokers and non-smokers alike, I'm sure), but now I plan to give up permanently.

It's an uncomfortable feeling when you realise that you can't move as quickly as you used to, you can't run for as long as you used to, and you can't do many things that a normal, healthy person could do without running out of breath sooner than you expect to.

I have no idea how it feels to smoke 10-20 plus cigarettes a day, and that worries me; if I feel unhealthy, how the hell do they feel? I have always felt that my late teenage, and early twenties years were relatively throw-away, and for having fun (Not completely, I do have a good degree, and I'm half way towards getting my PhD as we speak, so I haven't completely thrown them away!). I have always felt that smoking was horrible, yet I do it regardless, even though I find the taste disgusting, the experience awkward, and the smell unbearable. I have never understood why I started. There was no peer pressure. I just 'started'. Sorry to ramble on, but for those who feel the same way as I do, we can still find a way out.

Right, now on to the story!

This one is a little different, as it is not about cigarettes per se, more the 'Rastafarian Woodbine', but it's a smoking story, so leave me alone!

Following on from my last experience with cigarettes in Pt. 2, I once again went out to "Star/Electric Head" with my new friends, first stopping off at 'Strawb's' (the general nickname for a bar called "Strawberry Fields", those who go out in Leeds a bit will probably know of it).

This time there was something new in store. Round the back of strawbs, where all the emos/moshers/goths (including metal-lovers such as myself) gathered, F and K had brought along a joint, which I thought would have a nice mild effect, not learning from my previous experience, of course!.

They informed me that it was something called "Skunk", and it would probably be too strong for me, as I hadn't smoked a joint before this point. I told them where to go, obviously/foolishly, as I 'knew' I could handle it.

I took a nice big puff of the green stuff, not knowing what wonders it held for me... :\

After the joint was consumed between us, all was well for about 2 minutes until I started to feel sick.

Really sick.

Now this is the point where I expect anyone who has experienced weed before to say "Oh, just another whitey story", but you would be wrong.

I doubled over, expecting a Xenomorph to launch from my chest, gracefully/messily murdering all the drunken metalheads surrounding me.

F said "Rod, stand up or you'll be sick!". I took his advice, I wish I hadn't.

I stood up and then.. nothing.

All was black.

I heard the distant cry of "K, I think we just killed Rod!"

I felt like I had slept for a year.

Then my eyes opened, to see a smiling F standing over me.

*SLAP*

"Wake up, you silly fucker!"

It turns out that as soon as I stood up, my whole body gave way beneath me, and I slammed into the floor. What felt like a year was actually about 15 seconds, and I felt that all was fine, so I got up, feeling a little confused, but okay.

Then I was running.

HUH!?

I wasn't running, I was falling.

*WHACK*

I stumbled, head first into a wall.

Now not only was I stoned, but I was also cracking my head against a wall. BAD IDEA.

I loosely wobbled over to a low wall where I curled up cradling my head.

I fell asleep. Ten years this time (15 minutes). I awoke, remembering something about a girl talking about her first sexual experience, and offering my freshly woken self some boobs to feel. Uhhhh.. okay!

The experience left me with a slightly sore head for a few days, and, for some reason, an overwhelmingly large need to piss. The stoned effect was gone however, and I had to console myself with getting drunk instead.

I did have trouble getting to sleep that night, however, as I was still convinced that I had slept for an extremely long time!

Many apologies for my length (and a big cookie from me if you took the whole thing!), I think I can see some tearing, let me get some vaseline.
(Lythium deals in lead, my friend., Thu 20 Mar 2008, 14:46, 3 replies)

you have a sore head
because u cracked it against the wall.



what?
(it's not hash mixed drops, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 15:16, closed)

Bad Explanation
My apologies,

What I meant was that I didn't know why I had a huge need to take a piss, I'll fix it imminently.

:D
(Lythium deals in lead, my friend., Thu 20 Mar 2008, 15:35, closed)

@ Lythium
I know Strawbs well - and Star, what a creche that place is these days. Quite often go with soem friends who are quite abit younger and I feel so old!
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 15:41, closed)