I used to try and pick up girls on Myspace...
[My first post as a b3tan - Please be tender!]

...That almost never worked. When I first signed up I forgot to specify my sexual orientation, so the first person to send me a message was a guy. A 22-year old guy from nottingham who had no photos (I'm not gay but it would have been nice to know what type of guy I would attract!) Being 16 at the time though, I politely declined (something like 'fuck off i'm not gay you prick').

My attempts at getting girls would often start with 'hey, i cu liek [generic emo shite]! dey r awsom! u seem lyk a kewl chik lol! xx' It stupid, i'd spend ages deciding how many x's i would leave - too many and it's obvious, not enough and you're in the friend zone or, more often than not, they just ignore you cos they think you're a fucking weirdo stalker.

However, there was this one girl who replied back! She was this georgous girl who was absolutely lovely. We'd chat on myspace for ages with our non-sensical rants and ravings. She found me funny! I couldn't believe it, there was this amazing girl that was actually into me.

This carried on for a few months, until I plucked up the courage to, wait for it, ASK FOR HER MSN. For me, this was huge. I would be able to converse with the girl in real time! I was terrified, what if I don't know what to say to her? Will she still like me? I started my conversation with the great greeting 'hey', to which she replied 'I made biscuits today! Wanna see a pic?' At first I thought this was one of those viruses plaguing MSN in which if you accepted a file transfer your computer would be fucked, but no, there was the biscuit, frosting and all. I knew then that was an awesome girl!

Unlike many other people on my MSN, we actually kept in touch, she broke up with her boyfriend and I was there for her comforting her, making her laugh and being a nice 'friend'. There came a point where we became so comfortable chatting to each other that she suggested that we should meet up (we live 5 train stations from each other). This was too much for me, It's easy enough chatting to someone, you can time when you want to speak to them, but I assumed that if you with someone face to face, that it's probably not acceptable to have long pauses of silence while thinking of something quirky/funny to say! I was in Year 12, and it was getting close to exams when we finally decided to meet up. I went to see her.

I remember it was the weekend of the London marathon and the train was full of people going to it. Throughout the whole journey I had butterflies in my stomach. What was she going to think of me?

We met up, she was lovely in person (albeit quite short, the myspace 'angles' deceived me!) and I was my usual geeky awkward self, but was sweet enough to ignore it and not make the whole thing weird. It was brief, but enjoyable. Suffice to say this was well outside of my comfort zone, but I'm glad I had to chance to meet up with her and not pussied out like I have done with many other things in my life.

3 years on, I have her on my facebook but it's purely decorational, we don't really speak to each other anymore as I'm at Manchester and she is in London.

Oh, and on trying to wordplay this QOTW, I'm afraid the best I can come up with it 'So Shall 'Nette Work In Gaffs?' Can anyone work that into a story?
(pdawg, Fri 12 Sep 2008, 14:20, 1 reply)

I'm
all punned out. I need a 30 minute nap before I can go again. Have a click anyway.
(GONEism, Fri 12 Sep 2008, 14:22, closed)