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This is a question Sporting Woe

In which we ask a bunch of pasty-faced shut-ins about their exploits on the sports field. How bad was it for you?

Thanks to scarpe for the suggestion.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 13:40)
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PE doesn't exist
You do sports at school. I don't remember a single time I was actually told the rules of a sport in PE. I'm not making any promises, but if anyone had taught me the rules of football I might have been more interested in it. I can't think of any other subject at school where you're expected to know the material already.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:08, 9 replies)
^ this.
I think it was only basketball where they really taught us the rules. As I'd smashed both wrists in an accident (ha ha ha haven't heard that one before tell it again), I didn't get to play.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:09, closed)
You went to a school that didn't care about sports then.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:11, closed)
^ This, seconded
Teachers assume that everyone watches football at home, that everyone's dad talks about football on a regular basis, etc. Knowing the rules before being slung out onto the pitch might not have made it any more boring, but at least I wouldn't have got railed on for being on the wrong side of the offside rule on a regular basis.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:12, closed)
^ agreed
It was assumed that all boys are born knowing how to play football. I had no clue, never having been remotely interested. When the rules of rugby were explained, I quite enjoyed it. Especially as being rather chubby was seen as an actual advantage...
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:13, closed)

I'd still be at school if they'd taught the rules of cricket.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:45, closed)
I learned that when I got the ball in basketball
I tucked it under my arm and ran the length of the court before chucking it underarm at the hoop with both hands. It went in, but for some reason it was disallowed and no-one would tell me why.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:42, closed)
^ this
I don't think there's much I could add.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:48, closed)

When I was forced to play rugby at school, I didn't know the rules. My PE teacher shouted random things at me that I was doing wrong. I didn't understand what he was shouting, I presumed that this was because I thought I didn't know the rules of rugby.

Being older now, and watching professional rugby, particularly at international level, I understand why. The rules of rugby are made up on the spot. Rugby is essentially a game that involves 22 very large men playing Mornington Crescent on a football pitch whilst carrying a pigs testicle, and having a fight if they don't like the outcome.

So now this explains to me much of my childhood confusion. My PE teacher didn't understand the rules of rugby either. Unlike me he was too stupid to realise that he didn't understand the rules of rugby, so he made stuff up on the spot. He then shouted random stuff at the players on the pitch, in the same way professional rugby refs that he'd seen on TV, but safe in the knowledge that a 4'6" 4-stone schoolkid isn't going to react to being called cupid stunt in the same way a 6'6" 22-stone professional player might.

As far as I know my PE teacher has gone on to become a professional rugby referee on TV, hence completing the viscious circle by befuddling the current future generation of PE teachers watching his performance on telly.

Or something.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:59, closed)
This, so much.
(, Fri 20 Apr 2012, 17:46, closed)

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