Forgot this one.
Back in the dim dark days of the interweb, when everyone had dialup and blogs were barely heard of, when all I really used the internet for was to endlessly search for David Duchovny fansites (I was 14) and to faff about on AOL messageboards, I had a little Diaryland space of my very own, where I wrote all my teen angst and unrequited crushes and longing for some wonderful boy to notice me and love me.

One day, I made the fateful mistake of mentioning that I was currently enjoying the musical stylings of one Kirsty MacColl. This was true, and still is, but I wasn't prepared for the tidal wave of scariness I was about to unleash. Not long after this, I was added as a friend by a random user, with this being the only thing we had in common. Then the emails started: would I join his Yahoo group, would I come to their meetups in London, and all the time comforting me about my apparent singleness, as he was 32 and hadn't had a girlfriend in about 14 years. Considering the content of my blog (usually how lonely, and horny, I was), and the fact I was underage, this freaked me out a bit, not to mention his other obsessions with young nubile TV presenters and being a member of a ring called wejerkoff or something like that. I hadn't learned the capabilities of the block button at this stage, either.

He played a sizeable part in me shutting down my diary a few years later and starting up elsewhere, whereupon he promptly found me again and carried on like nothing had happened (we had mutual online friends and seemingly he followed the breadcrumb trail). This was made more bizarre by his decision to randomly change his username in order to "avoid being Googled" or something, and he carried on posting inane comments on my blog, such as "have you seen Viggo's new film?" (at the time I was fansqueeing over Lord of the Rings) and continuing to try and either get me to come to the meetups, or to get my home address out of me. I dodged all of these rather smoothly, but was beyond scared about six months ago when I logged into Facebook one day to find I had a friend request: him. Complete with photo, obviously taken in a photobooth somewhere (or else a mugshot). The overall impression I got was sex-offender glasses, bald as a coot and shiftiness. Considering he thought my real name was Loretta, this was a bit of a jump. Figuring I could stick him on my limited profile (as in, no phone numbers, no address, and making sure he could see "In a Relationship", however, I didn't think too much of adding him.

These days, he ignores my blog in favour of stalking me through the medium of pointless Facebook applications, the occasional wall post (which gets deleted) and insisting our friend details mention how he knows me. I'm sorely tempted to log in as my other half and tell him to fuck off.
( Maladicta, Fri 1 Feb 2008, 0:20, 8 replies)

Block him ffs!

( idonthaveafunnynickname Drink-Aware? Sure. I'm aware I want another drink., Fri 1 Feb 2008, 4:37, closed)

^this^

( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Fri 1 Feb 2008, 9:43, closed)

Kirsty MacColl
.. great! Missed by me :-(
( Piper Alpha is being a grumpy northerm bastard on:, Fri 1 Feb 2008, 11:14, closed)

click
Maladicta = owner of this weeks QOTW
(JasperSinister is offering two tickets to the gun show, Fri 1 Feb 2008, 13:13, closed)

I say
go for it (the last sentence that is), there comes a point where it's time to stop being nice. From the sounds of things that point came a long time ago...
(Badgers wear Corpsepaint it's true, I've seen them..., Fri 1 Feb 2008, 13:56, closed)

Firmness
Tell him to fuck off. Seriously.
(calamarain just invented dehydrated water, Fri 1 Feb 2008, 14:18, closed)

Kirsty MacColl
is indeed a legend and sorely missed by me. You should have seen the spam I got when she died though... until about 18 months ago I was still getting emails INSISTING I go to justiceforkirsty.org and sign the petition to have the guy who killed her executed or something.
( Maladicta, Sat 2 Feb 2008, 11:37, closed)

Block him
Why the fuck wouldn't you?
( wangmaster2000, Wed 6 Feb 2008, 17:07, closed)