Inventing
I invent all sorts of things, but I never have the resources to get them patented/marketed/on Dragon's Den. My latest invention is a penis-disguise kit which, with a rubber band and some flower-petals would make one’s penis look like a flower. The idea being that bees would come along and drink semen thinking it was nectar and then use it to make honey that could be given to people you didn’t like.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 10:25, 16 replies)

I'll give you $3 trillion
for a 1% stake and a jar of your spunky honey
(Monkeystrumpet monkey. Monkey, MONKEY!!!, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 11:08, closed)

Coincidentally
spunky honey is my wife's pet-name for me.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 11:12, closed)

take her to see the dragons
to reinforce your sales pitch
(Monkeystrumpet monkey. Monkey, MONKEY!!!, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:10, closed)

I don't want bees anywhere near my dick, thanks very much. I'm out.
Though since I was circumcised three weeks ago, I guess I could handle it...
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 11:23, closed)

that sounds uncomfortable
do the stitches have a bit of slack in them should you have impure thoughts during the night?
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 11:33, closed)

Thankfully it doesn't work like that
I didn't have the "full monty" - more of a reduction. So I now have a "twoskin" (arf)

Why am I telling complete strangers about my cock?
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 11:42, closed)

I dunno but I'm on the vinegar strokes so don't stop now

( Richard Shitheels, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 9:22, closed)

I think you should pop down to the local primary school at lunchtime and show this idea off to the kids at the school gate.
I'm sure you'll attract a lot of attention with it.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 23 Nov 2010, 11:27, closed)

I would
but bees tend to have gone into hiding by the back end of November.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 11:34, closed)

Bumble bees live in holes, which suggests a female version of the invention
"Honey, can you hear buzzing?"
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 11:41, closed)

I initially read all that as 'bumholes'
*phones optician*
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 23 Nov 2010, 11:55, closed)

wasps live up my bumhole
their papery nests make good underpants
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 12:54, closed)

You've got too much time on your hands. I mean, really ??
(Bitter and Twisted, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 21:52, closed)

this just seems to be a rather elaborate way
of getting bees to lick your cock.
(bagofpinenuts, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 8:17, closed)

I'm going to make butterflies my goal
Have you seen the size of their tongues?
( Richard Shitheels, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 9:23, closed)

surely
a blue whale would be the ultimate goal?
(Monkeystrumpet monkey. Monkey, MONKEY!!!, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:11, closed)