FOR CHRIST SAKE, SAY IT WITH FLOWERS
A few Valentines Day’s back my mate Steve decided to make his new girlfriend a pressie. He carefully melted down a load of candles in a saucepan on the hob, making sure he removed the wicks. He left the molten wax to cool for a bit, poured it into an empty coffee jar, left it to cool for a bit more. Then he jacked off over The Adult Channel freeview for a bit and shoved his erect manmeat in the jar. He was hoping to make a lifelike mould he could make a plaster of Paris model of his cock out of. All very romantic.

What he ended up doing was make his cock explode in pain and blisters and spend the next few hours in casualty on Euston Road having some African lady who resembled a fat female version of Nelson Mandella smear his shrivelled winky in swarfega while quietly chuckling to herself.

Steve should’ve tested the wax with his finger first, that way he’d have discovered it was still too fucking hot to have rampant and incredibly hot intercourse with.
( SpankyHanky, Tue 25 Aug 2009, 13:35, 3 replies)

Tell Steve that
they sell kits to do this
www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=5274
Also, even if the wax was nice and warm, you still wouldn't want to get a pube stuck in there, or an inadvertent manzilla may ensue.
( Sextant goes to him is emotionally erect, on this day, Tue 25 Aug 2009, 15:13, closed)

Why would she smear his cock in industrial degreaser?

( Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Tue 25 Aug 2009, 20:11, closed)

I couldn't help but notice...
You've spelt 'Spanky' as 'Steve'

Heh
( snee held his breath since, Thu 27 Aug 2009, 10:54, closed)