Nicked
Whoot Whoot this is my first time back since I had my baby.

2 weeks ago I nicked an A3 sized piece of crinkly silver plastic sheet (its like the silver marathon runner's cape) from her play group. My child is now 12 weeks old and she loves it, I couldn't deny the tiny child shiny crinkly tummy time fun. She can now lie on tummy propping herself up on her arms.

For those of you who aren't or are not yet the parent of a tiny child, this will mean nothing. For those who are or have been I think I am mother of a tiny genius. I'm not the slightest bit sorry for what I did. Fuck yeah, I'm going to be a Tiger Mum.
(Free pens 100, 101, 102 is still counting on, Thu 7 Nov 2013, 23:58, 16 replies)

Well, I think we're all glad you came back to share this fascinating insight.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 8 Nov 2013, 0:26, closed)

I made life
What have you done recently?
(Free pens 100, 101, 102 is still counting on, Fri 8 Nov 2013, 0:33, closed)

So your story is..
that you zinged AB!
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Fri 8 Nov 2013, 3:13, closed)

SHARE THIS IF YOUR A MOM AND PROUD

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 8 Nov 2013, 14:44, closed)

All the post natal depression in the world won't make her sleep with you.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 8 Nov 2013, 15:08, closed)

You realise that most parents have achieved more in life than just opening their cervix, right?
It's not an achievement. It's a biological function. You may as well brag about your bowel movements.

You probably do.
(comedy bully grrrr, Fri 8 Nov 2013, 8:07, closed)

haha

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 8 Nov 2013, 8:58, closed)

Men make life, women just have to carry it around for a bit.
Good thing my wife'll never read this.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 8 Nov 2013, 9:32, closed)

She has a point, Badge.
Gratuitous cuntishness doesn't resemble you.
( .Yeti., Fri 8 Nov 2013, 1:07, closed)

'Gratuitous cuntishness doesn't resemble you.'
Errrm,are you sure?
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 8 Nov 2013, 7:47, closed)

It's not normally this undeserved.
I just felt a line had been crossed.
( .Yeti., Fri 8 Nov 2013, 10:45, closed)

give it up mate, she ain't gonna sleep with you

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 9 Nov 2013, 16:14, closed)

Felicitations on having a working womb and the intellect of a sparrow.

(comedy bully grrrr, Fri 8 Nov 2013, 7:59, closed)

You seem a tad upset.
On the internet.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Fri 8 Nov 2013, 8:52, closed)

You know that babies are essentially just tiny retards, right?

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 8 Nov 2013, 10:03, closed)

especially the retarded ones

(andythepieman Is surfing the waves of indifference on, Fri 8 Nov 2013, 11:23, closed)