Floor cat
Sittingduck reminds me - our shed was a massive old thing; to give you an idea of the size at one point it had an old car in it.

Anyway, one day one of the neighbourhood cats fell through one of the broken floorboards and couldn't get out. It must have been as soon as we'd gone on holiday, because when we got back it was dead, and my dad tried to pull it out, but it had rigour mortis and he had to wait for it to rot down a bit.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 4 Mar 2014, 9:15, 14 replies)

MODS!

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 4 Mar 2014, 9:47, closed)

this is exactly the kind of filth and depravity that is ruining qotw

( rofl harris, Tue 4 Mar 2014, 13:00, closed)

I'm not clicking 'I like this' until I'm certain the cat was ok

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 4 Mar 2014, 14:54, closed)

It was OK.
Ish.

Well - a bit soggy and smelly after a while, but OK.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 4 Mar 2014, 15:30, closed)

did it smell nice?
I mean, was it a nice smell? Describe the smell for us so that I can be sure before I click this.
( rofl harris, Tue 4 Mar 2014, 15:51, closed)

The sickly-sweet stench of rotting flesh.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 4 Mar 2014, 15:55, closed)

sexy.

( rofl harris, Tue 4 Mar 2014, 16:22, closed)

What worries me is how was it supposed to feed itself
for the fortnight you were in Skegness?
No wonder it was scavenging in the foundations .
Tell your dad from me he's a twat.
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Tue 4 Mar 2014, 17:01, closed)

bless

(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Tue 4 Mar 2014, 17:02, closed)

shocking
especially if you skim-read it and come away with "one of the neighbours fell through one of the broken floorboards"
( ferret -> twitter.com/syfyautocorrect <-, Wed 5 Mar 2014, 0:50, closed)

*rigor

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 5 Mar 2014, 10:18, closed)

*stuffs cookie in your mouth

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 5 Mar 2014, 10:35, closed)

i thought it was janet reger
*leaves internet*
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 5 Mar 2014, 11:09, closed)

Are you
sure it was a shed and not a garage?
(little lord muthafuckin fauntleroy, Thu 6 Mar 2014, 12:45, closed)