Jane Austen
I was a student in Brighton and lived in Wales, and back in the late 80s the cheapest way to get there (even with a railcard) was cross country to Portsmouth, then along the South coast. It was a nice journey - pretty countryside, etc. - but it would take four or five hours. Longer if there were any delays. Some of the trains still had the old compartments, which were quite fun, but it wasn't SO great that doing it six or more times per year was an attraction in itself.

So it was important to have some good reading material. One year, with Christmas book tokens, I made the mistake of splashing out on one of those Penguin compendiums - in this case, the complete works of Jane Austen.

I'd never really studied "The Classics" (e.g. Dickens, Austen, Dumas, etc.) and felt I ought to give them a go at some point.

I got about sixty pages into Sense and Sensibility. It got put into a drawer at home, and never moved with me when I moved out. Mum left it there for a year or two, tried it herself, and then it mysteriously disappeared (to a jumble sale, I presume).

My summary?

If I wanted to put myself through an unholy mix of reported conversation, arch passive-aggressive sniping and over-elaborate descriptions of fairly simple ideas, I'd phone my mum.

I realise that's more evidence of my deeply shallow personality and literary tastes (mind you, I did make it through and enjoy The Name Of The Rose) than any slur on one of the Great Works of World Literature™, but I still can't be doing with anything resembling a Sunday night costume drama, for fear that it might have something to do with Austen.
( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 15:31, 15 replies)

Agreed
Really didn't get Jane Austen. You describe it well. It's long, long passages of being slightly twee and subtle, without really saying or describing much. And Pride and Prejudice is basically - 'Oooo. He's a really rich bastard, but that's alright because I can come to love him.'
(SnowyTheWereRabbit the Leporid from Hell, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 16:35, closed)

I agree Austen does tend towards dullness
but that's the point - it's realistic. Dull, but realistic.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 16:38, closed)

Jane Austen is shit.
Fact.
( MisterPunch did it that way on, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 16:39, closed)

I come from near Bath.
I cannot begin to describe the boredom induced at hearing references to Jane Austen.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 16:52, closed)

Click for:

If I wanted to put myself through an unholy mix of reported conversation, arch passive-aggressive sniping and over-elaborate descriptions of fairly simple ideas, I'd phone my mum.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 16:55, closed)

I know it's a bit tangential...
...but I once saw this porno where these novice nuns drill holes in their bike saddles then place dildos just beneath them, cunningly connected to the moving parts so that they rise and fall in concert with their pedalling. The nuns' long habits hang down sufficiently to conceal their mischief from Mother Superior, who is amusingly gratified by how much the girls are enjoying their healthy excursion and how eager they are to race to the head of the field!

Filthy slut-nuns.
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 17:59, closed)

good lord
that was the first porno I ever saw.

Very soft if I remember rightly. Basically a lot of semi naked 'nuns' on an exercise bike.
( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Mon 28 Jun 2010, 18:22, closed)

Very soft.
But what a brilliant idea by those nuns. And I suppose it would work for monks too - not that any of them would be into something of THAT nature...
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 18:24, closed)

Except that weird, fat, bald eunuch one
in Name of the Rose. See? Not tangential at all. Clicks.
(Happybara The jungle came alive and took him, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 18:29, closed)

click
"If I wanted to put myself through an unholy mix of reported conversation, arch passive-aggressive sniping and over-elaborate descriptions of fairly simple ideas, I'd phone my mum."

Has a whiff of genius
.
( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Mon 28 Jun 2010, 18:20, closed)

Jane Austen
The Barbara Cartland of the eighteenth century. Fan-fluttering twaddle.
(jennymnemonic, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 18:50, closed)

I'm surprised nobody's commented
on how much Austen's books are improved by the addition of zombies and sea monsters.
(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 20:05, closed)

Well, really
The addition of zombies and sea monsters pretty much improves anything!
(louveciennes , Volvospotter, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 21:53, closed)

Except sammiches, of course.

(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Tue 29 Jun 2010, 10:32, closed)

mmmmmMMmmm
Cthullu Sammige...
( DukeEuphoria Comes highly reccomended, Tue 29 Jun 2010, 13:02, closed)