Only remembered this today..
Whenever I'm driving with Mrs Abitsick and/or the kids, I always quote Eric Morecambe when an ambulance with sirens passes.

"He'll never sell any ice creams going that fast"

To the extent now that my 7 year old pre-empts me on seeing/hearing an ambulance by facepalming and telling me to "Go on then!"
( DanGleeballs Moist people don't notice spelling errors..., Tue 20 Dec 2011, 16:03, 1 reply)

I got the ex missus about 150 times when she'd say 'I think I'll take an aspirin'
I'd say- 'But you can't' and each time she'd fall for it and say 'why not?' angrily (always resentful of being told she can't do something by anyone else'.

'Because...the parrots ate 'em all'.
( Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Wed 21 Dec 2011, 18:47, closed)