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This is a question Winning

I once won a gas boiler from The Guardian. Tell us about times you've won, and the excellent and/or crappy prizes you've lifted.

Suggested by dazbrilliantwhites

(, Thu 28 Apr 2011, 14:08)
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I used up all my luck on Day One.
I don't win anything, ever. I could be the only person to enter a contest and I swear I'd still lose! I chalk it up to the day I was born: three months early, weighing one pound, thirteen ounces (that's what, a little under two pints?). The doctors explained to my mother that statistically, I had very little chance of surviving through the night, even with the immediate medical attention I received, and even if I were to beat those odds, the ones that I'd have no serious health problems (cerebral palsy was mentioned) and live to adulthood were even more slim. One doctor told my mother that if she hadn't picked out a name yet, she might not need to bother. She told him to fuck off. She always said that somewhere inside, she knew I wasn't going to die right then.

Guess what? I won. I'll be 34 in July, and aside from an iffy heart that's manageable on the whole, I was recently described by my doctor as bursting with health. Through the years I've randomly met a lot of new parents who have premature babies in hospital, and I've been told that seeing me, grown and healthy, gave them hope for their own little ones. So I might not ever win my body weight in Milk Tray or loads of money or other things I wouldn't at all mind having, but I daresay all my luck went to proving those doctors wrong and proving my mother right (which she now claims to be at all times).
(, Sat 30 Apr 2011, 1:59, 10 replies)
1 pound 3 ounces here!
I don't care that I never win competitions either. PREMMIE BABY CLUB UNITE!
(, Sat 30 Apr 2011, 5:43, closed)

I was 11 weeks early. Not sure what I weighed, but there is a picture of my hand being dwarfed by a 50 pence piece. My mum was told by the doctors that if I didn't have learning difficulties, at the very least I would be crap at maths. A bit later I had to have a shunt put in to drain cranial fluid.

At 22, I haven't needed any revisions of the shunt (i.e. supplementary brain surgery for funsies), and am studying physics and philosophy at uni. So I guess it's a win that I was lucky enough to be born when and where I was.
(, Sat 30 Apr 2011, 11:28, closed)
Ah, the baby-to-scale photos!
There's one of me in my father's hand, and while he is 6'4", I obviously take up entirely less space than all the other random things my mother chose to photograph for scale, like the cat, a loaf of bread and a football.

Good on you for also getting one over on the doctors! I am crap at maths, but I think that just runs in the family.
(, Mon 2 May 2011, 19:50, closed)
me too
the only remnants i have from being born early are two scars just below my neckline. apparently i was a little like kevin costner in waterworld - ie fucking 'gills'!

apologies for lack of grammargh
(, Sat 30 Apr 2011, 21:37, closed)
Tiny!
Did you also get dressed in doll clothes? Nothing in the baby sizes was small enough for me, so I got doll clothes. Upside: I had very well-dressed dolls when I was little!
(, Mon 2 May 2011, 19:38, closed)
Thanks, this was just the story I needed to read.
Thanks to the other premature people too.
(, Sat 30 Apr 2011, 12:09, closed)
Glad to help
I can imagine that it must be terrifying to have a child in that position, but at least technology has come so far since I was born and so many more babies live and thrive these days.
(, Mon 2 May 2011, 19:41, closed)

Exactly the same situation; three months early, weighed a pound, little chance of living, I'll be 20 this year.
(, Sun 1 May 2011, 3:35, closed)
One pound? I think you win!
When our oldest niece was born, she weighed five pounds and my sister-in-law was fretting about how 'premature' she was; a whole two-ish weeks early. You can imagine how I scoffed at that -- five pounds? I dreamed of five pounds! My husband said I only needed three more former preemies and then we could be the Four Premature Yorkshiremen, talking about how good preemies have it these days.
(, Mon 2 May 2011, 19:46, closed)
Something akin to...
"A womb?! I dreamed of a womb! I was born 3 months before I was conceived, photographed next to an amoeba and my mother lost me on the microscope slide..."?
(, Tue 3 May 2011, 15:24, closed)

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