Lactation
Ever since I was a small, hairy child with a lisp and dolphin teeth I've harboured a burning desire to be able to produce milk. Not for any perverse/sexual reasons, you filthy minded gerbil feltchers! I think it's more of a self sufficiency thing.

I have, in the past, constructed devices to help me on my quest. Using one of those baseball caps that can house 2 cans of beer, 2 bottles of milk (cows I'm afraid), some discreet tubing and some plasters. Unfortunately the lack of a closable nipple left me in a crying, milky mess. I tried to remedy the problem with some taps I got off a box of wine but I just looked strange.

I live in the hope that one day, in my lifetime a procedure will become available that makes this possible.

If not, I wouldn't mind doing a bungee jump.
(Elmintrude has lumps of it round the back, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 15:36, 4 replies)

There's no 't' in felching
...but there is tea coming out of my nose, since I desklol'd at the image of wine-box taps as nipples.

I call Rule 34!
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 15:43, closed)

I'm assuming you're male?
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Male_lactation
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 16:44, closed)

Well..
..God bless the internet. Now, does anyone know where I can get any dopamine inhibitors?
(Elmintrude has lumps of it round the back, Thu 14 Oct 2010, 16:51, closed)

From those L0\/\/£R PR!CE PH4RMA BUY CHE@P V1AGR@ sites?

( idonthaveafunnynickname Drink-Aware? Sure. I'm aware I want another drink., Thu 14 Oct 2010, 18:09, closed)