Out of the blue my internet has crawled to a halt. It'll load pages and it's connected it's just exceptionally slow.
Peanuts for intuitive answers/ideas.

Pants peanuts.
( Ttssattsr, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:36, archived)

Ferrets have penetrated the defence shield
and are stealing your internetz.
( The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:37, archived)

This sounds like reasonable troubleshooting.

( Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Wed 30 Jul 2008, 1:33, archived)

buy a new internet
yours is clearly stale.
( moohalaa, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:37, archived)

Remember your tough face.

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:38, archived)

RAWR. GARH. GRUMBLE.

( Ttssattsr, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:39, archived)

*tiger paws*

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:41, archived)

*Hat and whips*

( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:42, archived)

*struts*
rawr!
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:43, archived)

SPLURGE!
Right. I'm going to teabag the router for a while to see if it perks up. LOLBERBS.
( Ttssattsr, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:44, archived)

You need to wind it up again

( shitshitshitshit x_x, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:38, archived)

1) locate the HQ of your ISP
2)release hounds into foyer
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:39, archived)

I don't think this reply got enough attention.

( TonyUNDERSCORE from the Internet, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:57, archived)

You have almost used your internet for the day.
Try again tomorrow, it's obviously tired.
( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:39, archived)

haha, neither did this one actually.

( TonyUNDERSCORE from the Internet, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:57, archived)

your neighbour
is stealing it to look for midget porn.
( moogy boobles, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:39, archived)

THE MIDGET FANCYING FREAK.

( Ttssattsr, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:41, archived)

I knew it
there is one in every street (actually true for my neighbourhood minus internet stealing part).
( moogy boobles, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:48, archived)

Pray to the internet God that he may wrap his wiry arms around you and never give you up, never let you down, never run around, nor desert you.

( Lightguy hail satan, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:42, archived)

I reckon I'm about 6 months too late with this joke.

( Lightguy hail satan, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:42, archived)

It's night time.
Your hamster is trying to sleep.
( kaydup, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:42, archived)

He's not that stupid. He knows what I do to him if he sleeps.

( Ttssattsr, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:44, archived)

pfffffft

( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 30 Jul 2008, 0:56, archived)