I usually get out of trouble by not getting into trouble
I'm terrible when it actually gets down to a fight, I usually realise it's turned into a fight after I've tried to explain to his fist why he shouldn't be hitting me, by which point I'll be a bit bruised and grumpy.
( GrandmaOfShoes, Thu 21 May 2009, 9:46, archived)

Typically when a bit of trouble kicks off I say
'This is your first mistake'
( WormuIus, Thu 21 May 2009, 9:53, archived)