Hanging out with my brother
because he bought a car and is insisting on driving it to my house and visiting me, probably to rub it in, and i can't even take the damn thing for a spin.

Is bashing good? I saw that panorama about meeting people off the internet, sounded pretty rapey.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 20 Jun 2011, 16:03, archived)

tell me what car it is
and I'll tell you what withering thing you can criticise it for, to deflate his pompous balloon.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 20 Jun 2011, 16:04, archived)

Audi S3
I'm not sure if it's new or second hand, or what spec.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 20 Jun 2011, 16:06, archived)

Faulty lambda sensors, rattly suspension and a general falling apart of the trim
which is what you'd expect for an overpriced tarted-up Seat Leon
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 20 Jun 2011, 16:10, archived)

i don't what lambda senses are
but i think it's worth googling them to knock the smug bastard off his pedestal.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 20 Jun 2011, 16:12, archived)

They detect the half-life of any radioactive materials in the vicinity of the car.
Faulty ones are an immediate write-off, and could lead to mutation and cancer.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 20 Jun 2011, 16:15, archived)

just keep calling it a Leon
that'll wind him up enough, because he won't be able to argue with it.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 20 Jun 2011, 16:15, archived)

I think this will end badly for me
but he can't hit a cripple.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 20 Jun 2011, 16:21, archived)

If he uses the four-wheel drive argument
tell him it's a load of bollocks, it's FWD most of the time until a front axle starts spinning, and it's a shit engineering compromise that sucks loads of power out of the drivetrain, and he might as well have bought a proper TT like all the other hairdressers.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 20 Jun 2011, 16:23, archived)

i'm gonna need an a car in a similar price range that he should have bought also
just to make my sudden knowledge of cars that little bit more covincing.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 20 Jun 2011, 16:28, archived)

Alfa 147, much more attractive to the ladies

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Mon 20 Jun 2011, 16:35, archived)

I read that as lambada :(

( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Mon 20 Jun 2011, 16:16, archived)

awwww,
I will pay Grrrmachine (who seems to be our resident 4 wheeled expert) to build lambada sensors in to your car for you.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 20 Jun 2011, 16:19, archived)