Mondays are shit because I have to be in the office.
In-person work is soooooo 2010s. Or 2000s. Or 1990s. Or any of the other fucking decades before we figured out that in-person work is a waste of time and energy and fucking hell my line manager is a prick.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 3 Feb 2025, 9:02, archived)

It's ok everyone, I've had a wank now so I'm much calmer.
Gosh, you all look lovely today.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 3 Feb 2025, 9:30, archived)

Thanks, I just had my bi-monthly dip in acetone.
Keeps the dried-up ghoul look really well.
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 3 Feb 2025, 11:42, archived)

Is that twice a month or every two months?
Bi-monthly can mean either, and I need to know.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 3 Feb 2025, 11:53, archived)

Twice a month is fortnightly.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 3 Feb 2025, 12:11, archived)

Only once every 0.75 years, on average.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Mon 3 Feb 2025, 12:12, archived)

So what's Keira Knightley?

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 3 Feb 2025, 12:15, archived)

Tesco Value Natalie Portman.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 3 Feb 2025, 12:18, archived)

Woah

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 3 Feb 2025, 12:44, archived)

It's part of the Trouser Mystique.
You'll have to wonder, because I am such a tease.
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 3 Feb 2025, 12:42, archived)

Didn’t you know? Everyone who works from home is a lazy unproductive shirker
and it’s definitely not jealousy or having a vested interest in commercial property income
( Cheers Cheers, Mon 3 Feb 2025, 11:37, archived)