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there's a rat in my garden and it's digging up all my new plants
I've set a bait box with delicious poisoned grain. And it hasn't touched it.

Then i read the data sheet of the aforementioned poision grain and it says it's dyed blue which i can verify, and it also says it contains an embittering agent, i assume to stop idiots that would eat blue grain from eating it.

Well colour me surprised that ratty mc ratfuck isn't too keen on it either.

Garold, can i borrow that gun once you've finished murdering protected species with it?
(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt i said it b4 and i'll say it again... fuck you, Mon 29 Jun 2026, 17:43, archived)
i could easily twat it, the cunt comes out right when i'm sitting in the garden bold as fucking brass
Broad daylight!
(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt i said it b4 and i'll say it again... fuck you, Mon 29 Jun 2026, 17:45, archived)
sounds like you need a ship's cat
In your garden
(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt i said it b4 and i'll say it again... fuck you, Mon 29 Jun 2026, 18:09, archived)
who the fuck are you

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt i said it b4 and i'll say it again... fuck you, Mon 29 Jun 2026, 18:10, archived)
shat in your garden
maybe yours will catch on
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 29 Jun 2026, 20:11, archived)
there's a big black hole
where my arse used to be
(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt i said it b4 and i'll say it again... fuck you, Mon 29 Jun 2026, 21:52, archived)
Time to change your ringtone

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 Cannot actually train spiders, Tue 30 Jun 2026, 0:41, archived)
ha! very good

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt i said it b4 and i'll say it again... fuck you, Tue 30 Jun 2026, 10:54, archived)
- and it's digging up all my new plants I've set a bait box with delicious poisoned grain. And it hasn't touched it. Then i read the data sheet of the aforementioned poision grain and it says it's dyed blue which i can verify, and it also says it etc
what am I gonna do?
(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 13th Level Scrote, Mon 29 Jun 2026, 18:19, archived)
i'm gonna fix dat rat
that's what i'm gunna do
(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt i said it b4 and i'll say it again... fuck you, Mon 29 Jun 2026, 18:25, archived)
oh dear, how is it broken?
Do we need the rspca an ting?
(I helped save b3ta! Invisible Wizard - 13th Level Scrote, Mon 29 Jun 2026, 21:35, archived)
we need the rspcanal, the r2d2mybox AND c3povermyface

(I helped save b3ta! MiseryCunt i said it b4 and i'll say it again... fuck you, Mon 29 Jun 2026, 21:54, archived)
Sprinkle it over a slice of dry bread to leach out all the colour and embittering agent.
That way, the rats might go for your rat turps.
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti., Mon 29 Jun 2026, 19:18, archived)
Clearly the rat does not respect you as a worthy adversary. Go out into the garden shirtless with a machete and make a large cut down the left side of your chest, that should get its attention.

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 29 Jun 2026, 20:09, archived)
ahahahahahaahah

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Mon 29 Jun 2026, 22:00, archived)
What amma gonna do

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 Cannot actually train spiders, Mon 29 Jun 2026, 20:12, archived)