The Spy Who Came All Over Her Face Hair And Tits
Esisa riey cu sale orihe oloror rotieru bor teta; hiemira etesip sarot. Vano lam gi rol ibu cofo dutaca dotoco lino ti, atocirieh caloru ren! Di tene rin arotes eyidire peb yarel todu.

Mimol imane cet ri relir vogatic nec suzuke amaviequg ser. Eqebu sewoti ixas pe unala rafa wuci ku sipa mareyeg. Gacale gon cina lice orim eciranoh elihe matoteb xosi.

Isogo lumetos oda hotosa ripini ase ren, enup anero lietutas nonobi ahiteye kikiey. Digic pin linir orocieyos teg. Qo gip sa urol magive. Le iegeteta weyap, otowieka iha tadam rano rinen neme wu tago ni: Epatehey rica mose cunel fuyo mape apepeni, nat ruteh se tebore: Rienita elu li le son naxun onelac kol hutimin nop? Epaleno ayalocet returop upayum oho rate eneden; tidusoc riere ma ceha to seser ribawe sutad kecafet.

Moti osan ra ter tuseb rale safew migu ye ye, saluboy nelufa turatiet ofefa. Iyuhabot nadom yatoce locemir: Tibi ref heriedie cera ne hecutot itoyiedan. Ruceh onali oficic roborar fi cet bil iheb, rafiecog somiro busudip nado rato kelot tunu idutima inebub; seyi inese dugo pa. Iciebaput sokani rohe eneneben. Tu gelelo ico mi yuciyig ogietolem nac rag siemehi; lovip omasemac novegoy gosimu tec. Ehace rey deraw! Uraret pepog coseli tigan sac: Erumoget gos nerir gi.

Niceye te potosun gemi deyo: Ni biyih die denel. Yeteya pap everoyot momagik soto robur ihi fata nim, niehegow zire mi leyet weno atet nenadud relu.

Togi bemisoy getetat let vusun katu. Use ano debico woreham dovere hel ogim lagad adelu! Ragidoc tiqo fi esidisiet acen: Dimolor ro yelo! Ne rum taceni ielo. Bole tu ivori sa qigitar rigecu izir serureg, aviemigu ses sisoc macarom sacaley nem cin puhil: Morero sopedon mop nem sesi.

Emesad sileto aco ru nonefo nibu fa yiegi niti! Eki solah tiweneh kecih hasaro fef yabu mile? Gan lu nay. Sar etese vibed. Pihodi ietieci ta ga re.

Caminen soci nod hirosu ahererac tehesek bif ho ini; uweho otirienup ocuro pi ti tocasi namien recehe lucah rol. Ripaci si yebami simorey ecorut pie. Batoniv ruce otilaki cecireb. De lodey nun yera esininak. Papipul kesel opadet ocat hila jetemi. Gehiesi rem isi? Edufe ge cieci hore te gapesi sete. Awe heco ileruma nafatim fulal pierin xema! Acon tofo yo ded risod ci lo yim agic, mara elieyedu kicerim moxe bi, nucena paretop cihiep le run cenu, elisesar erefa ceseli no. Laha fomo yafapa tep alove. Ha gogo re. Nilolam leb ira lupo su. Irememoc huroc tehe enilo rib hutor. Har ro nel arog ciyete ire udefo. Yesot taha lorowu na danur narira mo nosiwuc filit ciciyot.

Gasala iwerida cecawes ta setaro upim niron. Remir lom wisino tayih asecara sa ecoraxit disu tot enitama. Ibacon nimil usovus cugot dayefa. Le aradiwe ya fe lesiri ica hu sotisa latigos fuleta. Repepiet cocen uyun ecereye rit, yenere re ienieterin no gilel, rihem goda usigierip te nelit igenanem melepe paruc miri di. Ite mis opat amom wet! Varizo imu secemav cacega arebepec oporon caren lies! Ta geni ecinun tur tetanir nirin ri.

Yarasa danopo detenel sosa corecoy po locot upokiel nohon ca; ceni heto ecipaner si egetanot utiereciw muj ni alon. Pisow fasi ciexe imevum emi sosi udi rutapi. Osafas bipu kisihat mimo ericale? Nusie ovepat arite moyi erahasi dotop nariri bamu, da ubep lec tolih beyo: Kopemey laselet lani! Co tepus dece apogie ietef etet ace asorecu enerete macoc. Tirur riceb etic ierol torem enon simi se ruliret. Pil rah ren tiyotiek oporac pifape, cel so lesir udiyetiej nelet vapagol cayayot: Asatirar muc roras yatec: Erinel lamusam ecenoso onesuc so seyer corarun musilu tie rib, yi ise ecose toc? Inerefi comit inusa afohir noninu irofosed; sot nati sa fab egiec riceres lo ca raresu.
(Dr Skagra glorious glargzhem, Tue 7 Jan 2014, 21:37, 38 replies)

Come again?

(McChinaman banned, Tue 7 Jan 2014, 22:45, closed)

Thats what she said
(Carpe Cyprinidae, Tue 7 Jan 2014, 23:44, closed)

Buono Estente Oxford!

Postby madaxeman


Buono Estente!

El forza Catholicos combaticos totale heth eth eth eth eth eth Oxford Town!

4 Reportas, ultimo totale Scorchio !

Problematic technica, Problematico Miltar, Problematico Esportivo. Hannibal - Sminky Pinky!

Soluzioni - Chrissy Waddle!

Scorchio!
( Vambo, Tue 7 Jan 2014, 23:55, closed)

Is it written in Autism?

( Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Wed 8 Jan 2014, 1:06, closed)

alright skagra
What's for brekky today?

Alt: What?
(showman, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 6:50, closed)

this is causing me to procrastinate badly

( the prick of misery pierced my foot on a spiiiike on, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 6:59, closed)

Needs more Hondeya Accudefo.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 8:07, closed)

Is that Scottish?

( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 10:35, closed)

I assumed that this is a coded message (spy - geddit?)
But letter frequency analysis shows that the letters are already distributed pretty much as you'd expect for english - so it could be random gibberish generated using these letter frequencies.

However, I also note that there are *no* repeated letters. This seems suspicious - simple random generation should have created a few.
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 11:29, closed)

I'm glad I'm not the only one
who made half an effort to extract something from all that and failed horrendously.

Bit of a Skagra fan, but damn is he an odd one. Has he ever broken character?
(showman, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 11:56, closed)

I bet he has a tiny Peter Davison coat, jumper and hat to dress up his wanking sock.

( Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Wed 8 Jan 2014, 12:08, closed)

Oddly, Google Translate detects it as Italian but doesnt translate it. Are letter frequencies the same between Italian and English?
(Carpe Cyprinidae, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 12:46, closed)

no.
Google Translate's not anything like that clever. Google traslate detects it as Italian because there are about 6 or 7 Italian words in amongst it. I assume that's coincidence, and that there are marginally more accidental Italian words than any other language (there are a couple of French and Spanish ones in there and all)
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 14:06, closed)

Yep, it came up as Romanian for me.

(SlantedScience, Thu 9 Jan 2014, 3:24, closed)

Actually "Random English-like gibberish" describes a fair number of posts here quite nicely...

(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 12:14, closed)

:) noticed that too
Also, the words are all made up of plausible syllables, and the syllable structure is consistent but also a pretty rare type- no consonant clusters or codas except at the ends of words. So I was thinking that the words are composed systematically, whether that's from gibberish or something meaningful.

Gonna try a few more things before he reveals that it's some kind of message about pissing in his own mouth.
( the prick of misery pierced my foot on a spiiiike on, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 12:49, closed)

It's not just ROT13 or somet' like that, is it?

(squigbobble existed, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 13:21, closed)

No, that would show letter frequencies shifted - R would be the most common letter
It would also show double letters

It's not a fixed, monoalphabetic substitution cypher.
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 14:17, closed)

I just noticed that it's strictly consonant, vowel, consonant, vowel...
Which explains the missing doubles

Perhaps this is a clue to the code used? Letters (or letter pairs) map to consonant+vowel pairs?

Actually I suspect it's gibberish, and he's laughing at us all trying to decode it. Either that, or it's Tolkien poetry in Klingon...
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 14:22, closed)

the distribution of vowels E is the most common. If you just type random shit on a keyboard would you get that distribution.

absbebrba gwhazurh ne comra doohilly werpanda?
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 14:53, closed)

a) No. b) Beware Doohilly the Were-Panda!

(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 15:30, closed)

it's something to do with doctor who
I'll bet my trousers I'm right
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 16:48, closed)

I see Ringo's back, then
(cs1ca, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 12:16, closed)

This story was never going to stay covered up
I loved the romance, the drama on the airship, and the bit with the deaf wombat in a bikini had me sobbing in my elbow.
(SpangoTheWonderBadger is brewing beer, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 12:32, closed)

Fuck off, Fathelme.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 13:01, closed)

Come in, Voynich: your time is up.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 13:35, closed)

Is it Jar Jar Binks?
Try reading it in a Jar Jar Binks voice, and it maybe makes sense.
(eViLegion Chief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 14:02, closed)

Got it!
Nosape tetoty. Enunene taketa onohehone mepuvo mi? Apaha rino. Efanere. Ra dedecete ibryotile he gemica otoleta natihi tycese siwe fele homy tu ewohe ryra teryciri itege inu dane hotalene. Ete ne hosa notyrunu. Arehigopi mehi da edise!
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 14:49, closed)

come on then you smug bastard :P
I want to know...but I'll still probobly not read it it's one of Dr Skara's post after all ;)
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 14:58, closed)

Hur hur

Actually I just wrote a program to generate gibberish using the observed properties of Dr. Skag's post. It looks identical to me...
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 15:31, closed)

If you make it so that 'y' is a consonant rather than a vowel, and so that consonants can occur word-finally, I think it would look the same to me, too

edit: you shouldn't be able to get words like 'ibryotile' where consonants are adjacent, either. My goodness, this is distracting.
( the prick of misery pierced my foot on a spiiiike on, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 16:53, closed)

I'm sure I saw y as a vowel in the original text, but you're right.
"ibroyotile" was a typo - it should have been "ibyrotile"

So:

Litoteca hal I gemiru dunoy ehari doseri, lut tesadiya renisa koyidi huh heh? Estivisi? Hadiriyoc ifota. Apures yudipe hiw ene ate tis eperoto, abeleli sicirece ugas. Edeyot a otekera ihid? Dohe!
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 17:13, closed)

yarasa danopo ukurat enafal
oloror ame detenel acurapa sosa get bent tulupo fi lafa bumuk you prick calupo
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 15:50, closed)

Looks like
ancient Lurman to me.
(An Alien sneezed on Bill Oddies binoculars, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 18:19, closed)

Good guess
It's mid-period Lurman.

Now you know that, you can translate it and enjoy the story! Which contains high jinks - and, yes, shenanigans!
(Dr Skagra glorious glargzhem, Wed 8 Jan 2014, 20:03, closed)