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MEmemememememmeme ME... and an evening thread.
I maybe possibly be being made redundant, they're restructuring Digital, starting from scratch by making up a load of job roles and everyone can apply for what they want but some people'll probably have to go and there are quite a few job roles that didn't exist before what with them rebuilding the main website in a language nobody on the current team knows.
I honestly believe I'll be alright whatever happens, I'm very good at what I do and can demonstrate the skills to do so, I doubt I'll be unemployed for more than a week, espesh with recruiters calling up so often.
I love the job and team and the company I'm in, but thats all changing, so maybe some fresh start'll do me good. I know from looking at the job sites there are a few dozen way-higher paid jobs that I think would like me. Money isn't much of a motivation for me, I'd rather take just what I need to live and be really informal or close to where I live.
Oh well, as the tatto says, Hakuna Matata.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 18:01,
242 replies,
latest was 12 years ago)
interesting times
good luck with that. If they make me redundant, I'm fucked, but I think I'm OK for now.
In other news I need to convince my body to become 3 stone lighter. I don't fancy dysentery, so, umm...more vegetables and time in the gym it is
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 18:08,
Reply)
Yup, deffo interesting times.
So many paths.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 18:35,
Reply)
roll a die to make a decision...
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 18:36,
Reply)
roll a make a decision
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:22,
Reply)
Good luck gonz
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willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 18:17,
Reply)
Cheers man =)
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 18:43,
Reply)
np
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willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 19:14,
Reply)
I got my new job via Huxley Associates
Having sent them my CV years ago they emailed me every few months with a job that properly matched my skills and when I did express an interest in one finally they were pretty helpful.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 18:18,
Reply)
Ill remember that name in the future
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willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 18:32,
Reply)
'The Light in Chains'
Has a certain ring to it.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 18:38,
Reply)
Oh cool !
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 18:44,
Reply)
Good luck with that Gonz.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 18:24,
Reply)
Thanks dude =)
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 18:44,
Reply)
Oh, if this is a generic evening thread as well, can I add...
'Tangles is a bender - NO RETURNS'.
Thanks very much.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 18:50,
Reply)
Seriously ? He's a bent bastard? With fucking kids?
I wouldn't let him near any kids unless it was supervised access on a Saturday afternoon.
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 18:59,
Reply)
And he's banned from the Northern line.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 19:01,
Reply)
Even kings cross?
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willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 19:02,
Reply)
he can go on the picadilly line station, but not the northern line bit
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 19:03,
Reply)
He has a special ASBO
Anti-social-BENDER-order.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 19:03,
Reply)
How did he pull that one off?
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willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 19:18,
Reply)
with a gentle but insistent up and down motion
increasing in velocity until complete
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 19:20,
Reply)
Thats because he stuck his willy down the sink and the little bendy bit in the bottom made it curl back up.
It was quite impressive, especially considering he didn't even need to put a knee up on the work-top.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 19:12,
Reply)
As a general comment
Margaery Tyrell would get it right up the dirtbox.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 19:12,
Reply)
If anyone from offtopic could woo her it's you LIC
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 19:15,
Reply)
Well, given her husband is a bender I like my chances
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 19:28,
Reply)
I like grace dent at the mo.
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 19:52,
Reply)
gr d +b
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 19:59,
Reply)
When I was made redundant I was out of work for five months.
Hopefully the web development market is better than the non-catwalk modelling job market.
On the plus side, I developed some pretty deviant tastes in porn during my five month 'job search'.
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 19:20,
Reply)
Ha ha. Getting sacked.
Loser.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:15,
Reply)
That's not very nice.
Clearly Gonz is the bigger man.
Not hard though, from what I've heard.
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:17,
Reply)
Certainly the fattest and most drug addled.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:19,
Reply)
Well, I can't call up the 5 numbers I've got in my phone from people who have tried to head-hunt me for the last 6 months, I don't know where I stand yet and its after work hours, they won't be in.
I'd be my bottom dollar that if I walk out tomo, which I won't, I'll have an interview by this time next week.
That's the advantage of being good at what I do, rather than using my company's collective achievments as my own. But I'm sure all these big brands you market would be corner shop one-offs without you.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:34,
Reply)
You fail to recall I successfully sold that company, which allowed me the financial freedom to take six luxurious months off before I was asked to join a FTSE 100 plc as a contract director.
I guess you won't have to worry about getting another job too quickly as mummy will bail you out like she did with buying your flat.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:39,
Reply)
I fail to recall a lot of things about you because I find you a dull little man, and as I've said countless times, little men come in all shapes and sizes.
I don't see whats wrong with my Ma' helping me buy my flat, I doubt there are many owners who haven't had help in some department or another, at least in london, its nothing belittling to me, I would prefer that than have a mother who lead me to call & define myself as "battered", which I doubt is in reference to a food coating.
Also, ain't you around double my age? isn't it a bit moot comparing achievements with someone a good 15 years your junior?
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:05,
Reply)
I am 38.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:21,
Reply)
Why isn't anyone very talkative this evening?
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:17,
Reply)
I'm all porned out.
:'(
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:24,
Reply)
clean up time
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:28,
Reply)
In my case it was because I had to nip out to the co-op
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willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:25,
Reply)
keep rocking out
did you get ice cream?
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:28,
Reply)
Beer and Digestive biscuits
I needed something to dunk in my tea while the cans cooled
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willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:29,
Reply)
I could help you with those beers
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:40,
Reply)
go on..
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willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:52,
Reply)
Too busy hanging wallpaper and drinking.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:26,
Reply)
those two things may end badly when combined
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:27,
Reply)
As long as I don't drink the wallpaper paste then should be fine.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:30,
Reply)
*sings* When Battered papered the parlour...
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:37,
Reply)
what a sight to seeeeee
EDIT: not the right words. it's been years since I even thought about that song, and I'm pretty sure I couldn't remember the words if my life depended on it...
Used to sing it at brownies, though.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:38,
Reply)
This is the first and probably only one of your puns I will ever laugh at.
As I am in Bristol on Friday shall we have small rehearsal of Jeffstock?
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:41,
Reply)
Yeap.
I've decided to take the rest of the week off - I thought 'fuck it, why not'.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:42,
Reply)
Excellent. Will phone you on my way from Llantrisant.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:43,
Reply)
It won't be a big one though.
I've got lots to get done Saturday.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:47,
Reply)
That works for me.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:48,
Reply)
I say that though....
Roughly what time do you think you'll be around?
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:49,
Reply)
6ish
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:52,
Reply)
That'll work.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:53,
Reply)
Jeff
Since I saw Meatloaf at Ashton Gate a few years ago, they keep sending me emails every week.
They sent me one today offerinmg me £10 tickets to Saturday's game. Should I go?
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:45,
Reply)
Do you like Bristol City football club?
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:47,
Reply)
Meh.
I'm only kidding. The choice is football or shopping.
There is no choice.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:48,
Reply)
Come on you REDS!
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:48,
Reply)
Are you mocking my spotty chin?
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:49,
Reply)
No.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:50,
Reply)
I'm making awesome internets instead of talking on here.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:29,
Reply)
Awesome sauce
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willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:30,
Reply)
That sucks, but I suppose it's better to be made redundant than fired.
And if you have savings (yeah, right, I forgot who I was talking to) then you could take a month or so to work on your super special make-you-a-million wordpress app.
Or go to work for that other company that's been after you. Or rent out your flat and live a playboy lifestyle on the Med.
i need a tattoo. I'm definitely going to get one in teh next year or so. It's going to be my midlife crisis thing.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:36,
Reply)
It's the Med(s) that might be part of the problem,
Get a tattoo when you come to Bristol.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:37,
Reply)
No, i think I need to do proper research into tattoo places.
There's supposed to be a good one here somewhere. Granddaughter #1 is friends with his daughter.
And I haven't finalised the design yet. I know *what*, I more or less know *where*, I just don't know size and colour yet.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:40,
Reply)
Big, red and on your ass
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:41,
Reply)
It's like you read my mind!
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:45,
Reply)
get one of a skull (on fire)on a motorbike (on fire)
playing an electric guitar (on fire) and surrounded by musical notes (on fire) and a nudey lady (on fire) who looks like a rotting zombie (on fire)
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:39,
Reply)
Here, Cavy, you're a lady-type, you'll understand my pain.
I can feel a massive fuck-off spot coming on my chin. What the hell?!?!
It's not fair. Every time I get to go out anywhere in public, my hormones freak out and my face explodes. : (
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:42,
Reply)
:( put toothpaste on it overnight to dry it out
it might work. Promise not to point and laugh at it on Saturday, as long as you don't laugh at how my nose has gone red with all the blowing
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:43,
Reply)
Answer is obvious.
Bag. Head.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:43,
Reply)
Feeling the love, Jeffrey.
Feeling the love.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:46,
Reply)
Sorry b3th.
Can't you cover it in make up or something?
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:47,
Reply)
Would you accept a BJ from a female with spotty chin?
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:48,
Reply)
yeah, it's not like I'm on the pull or anything.
And once you all meet me, any illusion of attractiveness will be down the shitter anyway, but there's no need for my face to make it fucking worse.
*mans the fuck up*
*cries*
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:52,
Reply)
Boil some water
put some salt in it, and dip a cotton pad or face wipe in to it, and hold it on that area as skin, as hot as you can bear it for as long as you can bear it. Works for me.
EDIT - and I shouldn't worry. All the girls will be too polite to say anything and none of the boys will even notice.
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berk, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:47,
Reply)
That's science ^
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:48,
Reply)
That's numberwang!
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:49,
Reply)
wait...is this how you burnt your minge?
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:48,
Reply)
No, that was on the oven.
and it was my hand, but there's no point ruining a good meme.
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berk, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:49,
Reply)
Why did you have your hand in your minge?
No, wait.... don't answer that one.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:50,
Reply)
If berk was a television weather girl
I'd be all over the 'hot periods' puns by now.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:50,
Reply)
she's like that x-man who shoots fire from his hands and...
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:51,
Reply)
Okay, just imagine, for the purposes of the following witty quote, that I'm a bloke (called Dave)
I went out with a hot fifteen year old once. Certainly got my fingers burned there....
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:53,
Reply)
how's the lorry driving business?
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:57,
Reply)
My minge doesn't burn things
my oven does.
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berk, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:52,
Reply)
+ when I put my MINGE in it!
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:54,
Reply)
singe minge
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:57,
Reply)
Indian lesbian Mingeata's life partner ^
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 20:59,
Reply)
TL:DR so I'm going to guess at the question and my answer is yes you should definitely do that gonz.
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:03,
Reply)
I've got a bowl of strawberries and grapes, bitches!
What about THAT, eh?
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:05,
Reply)
i made a smoothie earlier.
still poorly, though
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:07,
Reply)
*pats on head*
*sanitises hands thoroughly*
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:11,
Reply)
This weekend is starting to sound like a Happy Mondays album.
Spots, Cold and Smoothie-shakes.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:14,
Reply)
you massive massive twat.
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:15,
Reply)
What?
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:16,
Reply)
Everyone looks massive to Dozer.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:16,
Reply)
ha
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:17,
Reply)
I'm rather hoping I can avoid the pizza face look.
Unless it's me stuffing my face *with* pizza.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:16,
Reply)
You'll get a pizza the action.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:29,
Reply)
you made a smoothie poorly?
Did you leave the lid off?
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:56,
Reply)
It's been sent for a scan.
Cavy found a lump.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:57,
Reply)
I hate strawberries.
Even the smell makes me gag.
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Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:22,
Reply)
I'm the same with peppers
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:26,
Reply)
I'm the same with vomit
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:29,
Reply)
I'm the same with faeces
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:31,
Reply)
Alright Bob.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:32,
Reply)
easy
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:34,
Reply)
Alright Big Daddy
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:36,
Reply)
I have no children!
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:37,
Reply)
I'm the same with your face
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:33,
Reply)
OH MY GOD CAVY!!!!
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-south-west-wales-17754155Stay safe.... *sobs*
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:35,
Reply)
The carers here said I'd be OK....
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:36,
Reply)
yeah right, I'm handsome as fuck!
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:35,
Reply)
You seem to be confusing Cavy with Helen Keller.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:37,
Reply)
don't know who that is.
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:37,
Reply)
*shakes head*
And they're going to let you educate the next generation...
In other news, Weston's in the news:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2098853/Weston-super-Mare-gardeners-remove-swastika-flowers.html
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:39,
Reply)
I like how the mail felt the need to show a picture of hitler
any excuse
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:41,
Reply)
Well, he's not been in the news lately.
People might not know who he is.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:44,
Reply)
daily mail readers?!
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:46,
Reply)
That took Monty ages!
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:41,
Reply)
Haha, love this quote
With its associations with Hitler and Nazism in the 1930s, the swastika has become something of a taboo symbol
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:28,
Reply)
Only 'something' of a taboo symbol though.
God bess the Daily Heil, and all who salute her.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:29,
Reply)
To be fair to them
It wasn't taboo for a couple of centuries before Monty's lot adopted it.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:40,
Reply)
I don't get who complained.
It's not like you can see the whole shape unless you're high up, and that roundabout isn't really overlooked by any high buildings.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:43,
Reply)
Worst impression of me EVER.
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:58,
Reply)
hahaha
He's too tall isn't he?
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:17,
Reply)
The smell of strawberries gives me a headache.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:20,
Reply)
Is that the brand of poppers favoured in the North East?
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:21,
Reply)
I'm getting the new MacBook Pro when it comes out in two weeks.
It's beautiful. Life is beyond fandabbydozy for Barry right now. Carry on.
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Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:21,
Reply)
I'm not entirely sure they'll be one out in two weeks, I've not heard any news about them yet, aside they'll be using the new Ivy Bridge processors, which aren't for RTM yet.
This guide is normally very good, and the simple awnser is 'donno', but with two weeks, they would know for sure.
buyersguide.macrumors.com/#MacBook_Pro
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 21:53,
Reply)
Don't say that Gonz.
I'm going to be without a laptop until the new MacBooks come out. I can't wait longer than a couple weeks.
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Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:11,
Reply)
Bloody kids, who'd have 'em, eh?
I have finally sat down, having spent 2.5 hours with a 6 year old crying in bed because it's hurting as a new tooth is coming through. I mean, yeah, boo hoo and all that, but really it is time to shut up and go to sleep.
In other news I am listening to The Band in tribute to the nearly dead Levon Helm.
How's everyone else?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:28,
Reply)
I called you a BENDER ^ there somewhere.
1-0 Jeff.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:29,
Reply)
Bender
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:30,
Reply)
That doesn't count because I added 'no returns' to the insult.
2-0 Jeff.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:31,
Reply)
Damn you
I need to get more creative with the insults...
Er... You shit
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:33,
Reply)
Shut it you BUMDER.
Now, go and rub some bonjella on your whinging kids mouth.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:34,
Reply)
I AIN'T GOT ANY!!
Had to make do with overdosing him with Calpol
/McCannlols
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:36,
Reply)
their mouth wouldn't hurt if you let your kids eat meat.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:39,
Reply)
Sadly not.
And is it any wonder the dog fucked off? Every time he wanted to go for a piss there was a human with its leg already cocked against a tree.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:44,
Reply)
They must be really desperate.
I'd hate to think of Biscuit outside by himself for days on end. he wouldn't last five minutes, the big poof.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:45,
Reply)
How old is biscuit?
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:46,
Reply)
Eight.
He'll be nine at the end of June. Old man doggy now.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:50,
Reply)
I take it he hasn't slowed down that much if he is still all needy.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:59,
Reply)
He's actually getting more needy as he gets older.
We think it's because he realises he's getting old. He's a bit slower and arthritic these days.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:03,
Reply)
Found it and clicked it
You felcher
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:45,
Reply)
You know that Joey Deacon...
That's you, that is.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:47,
Reply)
*throws shoe at Jeff*
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:50,
Reply)
You see that Elephant Man...
That's you looking your best that is. That's you on your way to a hot date.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:05,
Reply)
You see those workman's tents in the road?
That's your house. That's where you go on holiday.
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:15,
Reply)
Not me, that's who.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:37,
Reply)
Any news b3th?
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:40,
Reply)
No : (
not yet.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:42,
Reply)
Fingers crossed for you.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:44,
Reply)
No, you bypassed all that and went straight to: Granny
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:41,
Reply)
So?
Everyone knows grannies are awesome.
Saying that, my mum was giving me the whole 'you don't know what you're missing' thing last night.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:44,
Reply)
It's quite handy though that you already had a blue rinse.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:45,
Reply)
and a pocket full of Werthers
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:46,
Reply)
Are you still getting a cheap fish and chip lunch on a Friday?
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:47,
Reply)
Nah, i get meals on wheels now.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:50,
Reply)
She was looking forward to you suffering like she did.
Are Roota and your bro likely to make her happy?
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:47,
Reply)
Nope.
she has a brother and a sister. Her sister is already a granny, and her brother's only child is a big gayer, so I don't think the family genes are being spread too well.
Ah well, never mind, eh?
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:49,
Reply)
#Sings to the tune of the Addams family theme...
Her sister is her mother,
Her uncle is her brother,
They only shag each other,
It's Roota's family...
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:03,
Reply)
IMPORTANT JEFFSTOCK ANNOUNCEMENT
The Apple serves food till 8.
Somebody actually phoned and asked.
(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:55,
Reply)
Eating is cheating, Lighty.
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:57,
Reply)
It's worse than I thought.
Not only have you denied your small people bacon. You've now denied them ALL food.
I hope Wet, Wet, Wet release a fund raising single soon.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:59,
Reply)
They're too busy with the skag to worry about my kids.
Surely all the food you are going to need is contained within the apples in the cider?
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:01,
Reply)
A few years ago, I'd have agreed with you.
But the number of times I've left The Apple in pain would suggest otherwise.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:02,
Reply)
Not a young man anymore, Jeff
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:04,
Reply)
I'll be 38 this year.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:05,
Reply)
Fuck me
that's old.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:07,
Reply)
On the b3th scale. That's almost 'half a husband'.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:08,
Reply)
She'll start grooming you in a couple of years
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:09,
Reply)
Reckon I'm safe for another couple of decades.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:10,
Reply)
And I'll be 36
How did that happen eh?
At least we're not as old as b3th
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:07,
Reply)
I think that happened because I was born a couple of years before you.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:09,
Reply)
Oh, fuck you, bitch!
I'm younger than Stunned and Monty.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:15,
Reply)
Younger than Methuselah and Jared?
That's not really saying much...
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:20,
Reply)
Just like to point *I* phoned
(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:11,
Reply)
As opposed to Mr "I think they only do lunches"
(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:11,
Reply)
Oooh.
Get you.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:13,
Reply)
Really? Who'd thunk it.
Next door to The Apple is this place.
www.spyglassbristol.co.uk/
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 22:58,
Reply)
That does look good
but equally so do the ploughmans they do at the apple.
(
berk, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:10,
Reply)
Swings and roundabouts innit.
If you want to 'eat' I'd suggest The Spy Glass (or any of the other 'food places' nearby), if you want to snack, the apple will be fine.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:13,
Reply)
I'll probably have a big, lateish lunch
and nibble when I start getting tipsy.
(
berk, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:18,
Reply)
*volunteers to be nibbled*
(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:19,
Reply)
I figure big lunch
then ploughman's at the Apple. But it sorta depends on what BOBBY WANTS TO DO SINCE I NEED TO GIVE HIM A BIG BOX OF STUFF.
Ahem.
(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:19,
Reply)
Drugs.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:19,
Reply)
Far worse than that
(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:19,
Reply)
Something from West Brom?
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:20,
Reply)
Just a giant box
OF STUFF.
(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:26,
Reply)
Tonight's TOWIE was hilarious for the first time in ages.
I've also decided I need a Burberry trench coat.
I'm just thinking out loud here.
(
Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:15,
Reply)
www.youtube.com/watch?v=316AzLYfAzw
(
ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:15,
Reply)
Nice!
(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:21,
Reply)
i know
(
ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:22,
Reply)
I am going to see Primal Scream for the fourth or fifth time in June.
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:16,
Reply)
I'll be seeing them in June as well.
For the 3rd or 4th time.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:18,
Reply)
bad luck
(
ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:20,
Reply)
This.
(
Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:24,
Reply)
still on a high?
(
ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:25,
Reply)
Very possible that this smile is permanent.
(
Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:25,
Reply)
I've never seen them
And I have no intention of doing so.
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:23,
Reply)
Me neither really.
I've just seen them at festivals.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:23,
Reply)
FUCK.
A bit of a tooth has just fallen out.
This is gonna be pricey.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:21,
Reply)
Ouch.
How did you manage that?
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:23,
Reply)
I just bit in to a nut.
No pain, but this can't be a good sign.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:24,
Reply)
If there's no pain
either the tooth is properly fucked, or you haven't done that much damage.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:27,
Reply)
That makes me feel no better at all.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:29,
Reply)
I'd kill myself if my teeth got damaged.
They're perfect and need to stay that way.
(
Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:24,
Reply)
I'll be investigating my options tomorrow.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:25,
Reply)
I had my first filling last year
and couldn't afford the white cosmetic stuff they use for fillings. I actually cried when I saw that horrible amalgam stuff.
(
berk, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:28,
Reply)
Tippex.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:30,
Reply)
Your thirties are going to hit you like a mallett in the face.
You do realise that, don't you?
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:29,
Reply)
Not if I look after myself between then and now.
I'm nothing without my handsome face.
(
Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:31,
Reply)
hahahhaahahaha
*breathes*
hahahahhahahahahahahahahaha
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:32,
Reply)
*Joins b3th is laughing*
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:34,
Reply)
You laugh now but you'll be swooning if you ever catch a glimpse of me doing Blue Steel.
(
Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:35,
Reply)
What on earth is Blue Steel?
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:35,
Reply)
It's off Zoolander
tb does a good impression.
(
berk, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:36,
Reply)
I'm still none the wiser.
Not being familiar with either Zoolanders or TB.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:38,
Reply)
Google it
it's Ben Stiller.
(
berk, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:44,
Reply)
Is it that good?
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:47,
Reply)
Get to know your shit American comedies
youtu.be/D519hT7-ytY
(
Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:40,
Reply)
That clip didn't really sell it to me.
Have some camp music to follow it up with.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhgjEObtrWE
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:42,
Reply)
I love love love the Bee Gees.
(
Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:47,
Reply)
You will hate this probably
www.youtube.com/watch?v=f8uc7c0HZuc
(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:49,
Reply)
I'd imagine he does.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:55,
Reply)
How about this:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=TmcHPk8_1N8
(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 0:01,
Reply)
That's as bad as this :-)
www.youtube.com/watch?v=s2lYwBBrII8&feature=fvst
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 0:03,
Reply)
That's quite nice.
I'm playing non stop Italo disco at the moment -
youtu.be/3-PjsarOf2k
(
Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 0:03,
Reply)
I'm listening to Snow Patrol now.
*jumps out third floor window*
(
Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:25,
Reply)
You should go to a higher floor
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:26,
Reply)
My house is ace but it doesn't go that high unfortunately.
(
Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:26,
Reply)
*lights up*
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:26,
Reply)
I've stopped now.
And have got this banger on the go instead
youtu.be/doqbTNPPC4I
(
Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:27,
Reply)
shite
(
ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:26,
Reply)
I'm starting to fall asleep here
Time for bed. 'Night all.
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Apr 2012, 23:33,
Reply)
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