b3ta.com board
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Messageboard » XXX » Message 10869087 (Thread)

# Haha, I curse the cheff at our local teppanyaki for his one handed break....
Stop showing off and just use two hands and then I won't finish up with shell in my egg.....
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:23, archived)
# Really? I've never even tried to break an egg with two hands
(I helped save b3ta! Ham o' Shatner -.-- --- ..- .-. / .- .-.. .-.. / --. .- -.--, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:27, archived)
# I tried once and caused the 1982 Lebanon war.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:28, archived)
# I'm cack handed, I just finish up with a handfull of egg and shell and half a brocken egg in the pan...
Just like the cheff at the teppanyaki! ;-)
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:31, archived)
# I'm crack handed
I can do one in each hand, like a pro. ;)
(I helped save b3ta! Ham o' Shatner -.-- --- ..- .-. / .- .-.. .-.. / --. .- -.--, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:33, archived)
# Film it and do a youtube tutorial ;-)
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:36, archived)
# Cheers, all :)
To find a decent shot of someone cracking an egg I had to sift through far too many cookery tutorial vids on youtube... plenty of them were one-handed breaks which made me envious
(other things I can't operate with one hand: putting on my watch, peeling a satsuma and ladies bra straps.)
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! The Silent Channel is getting his recommended 5-a-day, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:28, archived)
# How the hell do you put your watch on with two hands?
Have you got the time on you cock?
(I helped save b3ta! Ham o' Shatner -.-- --- ..- .-. / .- .-.. .-.. / --. .- -.--, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:29, archived)
# I like the idea of a watch cock...
yeah I said it wrong, what I meant was I sit down, press the watch face against my leg so it doesn't move while I fasten it... I'm cack at it otherwise
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! The Silent Channel is getting his recommended 5-a-day, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:36, archived)
# Eh? You like to watch cock?
The evidence is really piling up :D
(I helped save b3ta! Ham o' Shatner -.-- --- ..- .-. / .- .-.. .-.. / --. .- -.--, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:40, archived)
# Do you like fish sticks?
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:55, archived)
# I like to put fish sticks in my mouth, yes.
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! The Silent Channel is getting his recommended 5-a-day, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:56, archived)
# you must be a gay fish with a watch on your cock and a bra you can't take off!
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:58, archived)
# This thread has ruined my good name!
Oh, the headlines tomorrow...
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! The Silent Channel is getting his recommended 5-a-day, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:01, archived)
# you had a good name?
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:03, archived)
# Yes,
unless you've been talking with my ex, of course
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! The Silent Channel is getting his recommended 5-a-day, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:08, archived)
# i don't have to worry about that
most of my exes are dead, curiously enough....
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:13, archived)
# Er, ooh. Hmm.
Not sure how to react to that
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! The Silent Channel is getting his recommended 5-a-day, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:19, archived)
# there's a reason my mates call me the black widow :(
having 3 exes commit suicide is a bit odd
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:22, archived)
# Wow, that's pretty rough
As coincidences go, that's more than a bit upsetting
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! The Silent Channel is getting his recommended 5-a-day, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:28, archived)
# they were all a long time after we split
one went nuts and put his head in the oven, one hung himself because he owed nasty people lots of money and the third was a drugs thing. it's nasty, but shit happens and you can't say who it should happen to
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:34, archived)
# Aye :(
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! The Silent Channel is getting his recommended 5-a-day, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:49, archived)
#
Restaurants will serve anything these days
(e1865, Wed 24 Oct 2012, 12:11, archived)
# On the front page for the world to see!
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:03, archived)
# Two hands for me garentees a decent egg ;-)
I once hand my hand in plaster for a month, It was only then I realised how forgranted we take having two hands...
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:35, archived)
# particularly for bathroom procedures I can imagine
I've always hung my toilet paper 'underhand' (hanging bit closest to the wall) because you can easily snap off a sheet with one hand by pushing your wrist into the roll.
Most people hang it overhand and I always think ahh, you haven't discovered the hidden advantage yet then...
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! The Silent Channel is getting his recommended 5-a-day, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:42, archived)
# I always thought having a wee was a one handed procedure....
I found the only safe way was to put my trousers around my ankles...
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:47, archived)
# haha! bra straps are easy :D
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:35, archived)
# Using scissors doesn't count.
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:37, archived)
# It's only LADIES bra straps he finds difficult
Mens, on the other hand.......
(I helped save b3ta! Chumps 👀, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:37, archived)
# Maybe he should just stop wearing them altogerther!
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:40, archived)
# A watch on my cock and a bra I can't take off
utterly scandalous accusations!
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! The Silent Channel is getting his recommended 5-a-day, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:46, archived)
# And just then the vicar walked in ! ;-)
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:48, archived)
# can't you just get your cook to make it for you?
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:36, archived)
# Are they cooks and not cheffs?
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:38, archived)
# only the ones who cook for you and the rest of your household staff
such as the butler and the scullery maid
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:40, archived)
# Pffft, as if I allow my household staff the luxury of having cooked food, next you'll be saying I have to feed the plebs every day!
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:44, archived)
# you mustn't feed them every day!
their little tummies can't take it! gruel is surprisingly filling, you know
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:49, archived)
# I think they're gorged on too many F's...... the chief's been over ffeeding them...
Bugger, now all I want to do is go to the chinese buffet bar!
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:54, archived)
# mmmmmm
steamed ribs in black bean sauce....
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 17:57, archived)
# STOP IT!....... ;-)
Tonight is healthy low cal night :-(
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:00, archived)
# i'm having slightly weird comfort food
in the form of mushy peas and onions
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:06, archived)
# With bread and butter I hope.....
I bet it's what your mum had waiting for you when you used to come home from school in winter and it made you feel all warm relaxed at home isn't it.
Sorry if it's what jimmy savile gave you when you were in hospital...
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:14, archived)
# actually, my mum calls me disgusting for eating it
i mix up things i like to see if they go well together. might add some ghost chillies to it, if i feel like something a bit spicy
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:17, archived)
# Well my theory is,
A hot dog goes with onions and a hot dog goes with mushy peas, so mushy peas should go with onions, but I don't think I'd want it!
(The invisable man Is having a long lazy soak in search, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:22, archived)
# it's lovely!
i'd never eat the hot dog, though.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sun 21 Oct 2012, 18:24, archived)