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# I bet it comes alive at night,
and watches you asleep in bed.
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 12 May 2003, 13:11, archived)
# And masturbates frantically.

No story is right without some sort of masturbation reference.
(s0WmVHAwZgpG, Mon 12 May 2003, 13:12, archived)
# That
puts Enid Blytons whole canon of work right out the window.

"What are you doing Moonface?"

"Gnnnn, aaahhh, mmmm,hgnnnnnnn".
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Mon 12 May 2003, 13:15, archived)
# In Mallory Towers
the girls used to get spanked with their own hairbrush if they misbehaved. No greater indignity, apparently.
(I helped save b3ta! butchbint, Mon 12 May 2003, 13:18, archived)
# hehehe
indignity

I preferred St Claires, myself
(I helped save b3ta! blyerkit e k trilby, Mon 12 May 2003, 13:22, archived)
# a vastly inferior read
in my opiniparp
(I helped save b3ta! butchbint, Mon 12 May 2003, 13:24, archived)
# nicer uniform
though
(I helped save b3ta! blyerkit e k trilby, Mon 12 May 2003, 13:26, archived)
# this is true
they were all great, made me want to be sent away to school.
(I helped save b3ta! butchbint, Mon 12 May 2003, 13:29, archived)
# and dribbles a bit
but it dries by the morning.
(I helped save b3ta! pep, Mon 12 May 2003, 13:12, archived)
# shit
I thought they were rice cakes left by the fairies!!!

EURGH!!
(I helped save b3ta! Lord_Munkee, Mon 12 May 2003, 13:18, archived)