b3ta.com board
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Messageboard » Gloots! - Co-joined Product Innovation » Message 2957039

[challenge entry] Spatchcock!
Its was already a fantastic word and now its a fantastically crude conjoined product that takes the innovation of the hand drawn cock to a new level.



Do with it what you will. My first ever compo entry by the way

From the Gloots! - Co-joined Product Innovation challenge. See all 388 entries (closed)

(I helped save b3ta! Nimble Colin camera-wrangling, globe-trotting whisky enthusiast, Sat 27 Mar 2004, 19:53, archived)
# Ermmmm....
ermmm...
(I helped save b3ta! 100% of Gibbon, Sat 27 Mar 2004, 19:54, archived)
# did you get the beer
?
(I helped save b3ta! Dill, Sat 27 Mar 2004, 19:56, archived)
# No beer for me I'm afraid.
I'm taking skint to new levels. I could only afford basics such as bread, milk and Southern Comfort. I saw your message though, cheers.
(I helped save b3ta! Nimble Colin camera-wrangling, globe-trotting whisky enthusiast, Sat 27 Mar 2004, 19:58, archived)
# just thinking
I may have to send you my taste buds, last time I drank pine ale was in glencoe, we'd been camping for 3 days and pissed up the entire time, so it my not taste the same to you
mind you it's a good pint
(I helped save b3ta! Dill, Sat 27 Mar 2004, 20:00, archived)
# How do you propose to do that?
And wouldnt I need to put them in my mouth? And wouldnt that be like kissing you? And isnt that a bit, y'know...bumgay?
(I helped save b3ta! Nimble Colin camera-wrangling, globe-trotting whisky enthusiast, Sat 27 Mar 2004, 20:07, archived)
# Which end do you hold?
'cause I'm definitely not grabbing the pointy end!
(.o0o.Purple-Circle.o0o., Sat 27 Mar 2004, 19:56, archived)
# I'm not sure I would hold it.
It would certainly be a talking point at parties though if positioned prominently in the room. On the mantlepiece perhaps?
(I helped save b3ta! Nimble Colin camera-wrangling, globe-trotting whisky enthusiast, Sat 27 Mar 2004, 20:00, archived)
# I love that
Is it for girlies to keep the flies away whilst masturbating?
Or to fry fish whilst masturbating as cover for poor hygiene?

btw anyone able to tell me how to read an IP address or URL from a text file and have that link come up on a web page? Tried google, but none of the cunts seem to know what I mean
(It doesn't always sting when you piSSSS., Sat 27 Mar 2004, 19:56, archived)
# Depends on your server.
ASP, PHP etc all have commands to read external files and use data from them.
(.o0o.Purple-Circle.o0o., Sat 27 Mar 2004, 19:58, archived)
# Ideally just a bit of javascript that does it
I've developed something that sends my home IP address to a file on a server via FTP whenever it changes. What I want to do now is to create a web page which automatically incorporates the file contents as a link.
(It doesn't always sting when you piSSSS., Sat 27 Mar 2004, 20:03, archived)
# If your server supports ASP
its waaaaaay easier doing it that way.
See this file for an explanation. There's PHP and CFM versions also but most servers I work with are Microsplat so I use ASP.
Just save the page as pagename.asp or pagename.shtml or it won't work.
(.o0o.Purple-Circle.o0o., Sat 27 Mar 2004, 20:09, archived)
# I really need to do it in javascript if I can
Because my free ISP webspace doesn't have any scripting capability, so I need something client side. I suppose I could make a little Flash applet that does it.
(It doesn't always sting when you piSSSS., Sat 27 Mar 2004, 20:12, archived)
# Flash would be even easier.
Although your visitors will need to have Flash installed. Not so much of a problem nowadays though. I wrote this for a nightlub that I do work for. It reads from a text file. If you want I can send you the basic .fla file with the actionscript.
(.o0o.Purple-Circle.o0o., Sat 27 Mar 2004, 20:21, archived)
# Pups nuts!
Thanks. That would be great. mattbrook ??aht mac ??dote** com.
(It doesn't always sting when you piSSSS., Sat 27 Mar 2004, 20:41, archived)
# is it to toss fish?
is it?
(JcmS, Sat 27 Mar 2004, 19:58, archived)