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# thread bait
Once upon a time...
(I helped save b3ta! izb posting occasional messages since 2001, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 8:52, archived)
# not so long ago
there lived a young girl and her name was Emily.
(I helped save b3ta! fastcar, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 8:59, archived)
# Where did she live?
In a galaxy far, far away
(I helped save b3ta! Craymen, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 9:03, archived)
# with only
a marmot in a jar of marmite for company
(I helped save b3ta! raw-edge, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 9:12, archived)
# kicking aside the pile of bloodied kitten heads
she made her way, blinking, into the sunlight.
(I helped save b3ta! pep, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 9:05, archived)
# it had been a heavy night for Emily.
She had spent the night ripping the heads off kittens so she could take photos of them for the B3ta message board.
(I helped save b3ta! fastcar, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 9:09, archived)
# but even though she posted a great picture
she didnt get a single wooyay.
people saw the picture and liked it, but didnt have anything to say about it

emily felt rejected
(I helped save b3ta! DaWolfey, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 9:10, archived)
# And went to the guns and banjos shop.
But not for a banjo.

"Phase plasma rifle in the 40watt range", she said in an austrian accent.
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 9:23, archived)
# "and if it can play
nice banjo-ish tunes as it fries people's brains into a bloodied pulp" she said "all the better"

She was a senstive girl, and had enjoyed the sweet music of a banjo from a young age.
(I helped save b3ta! pep, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 9:26, archived)
# The guy from gremlins, who was
working a the guns and banjos shop part time, looked up and said:

"You know your guns".

Emily started loading her gun.

"You can't do that", said the guy from gremlins.

"Wrong" said Emily, and shot him.

"OW! Why the fucksocks did you do that?" said the guy from gremlins, "That really hurt!"

"Sorry", said Emily, "finger slipped".
(I helped save b3ta! Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 9:28, archived)
# all of a sudden she heard a noise
outside. The entire cast of the A Team had arrived in an armoured personell carrier they'd managed to fashion from an old cardboard box and some cheese...
(I helped save b3ta! pep, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 9:58, archived)
# "are you austrian?" asked the shopkeeper.
"no" replied emily.
(I helped save b3ta! mikeisbrill, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 9:28, archived)
# unaware of the previous nights
events
(I helped save b3ta! pickledpizza Older, nicer, fluffier., Tue 30 Apr 2002, 9:09, archived)
# Wow, it's starting to fork already.
If you want to read about the previous nights events go to 126. If you want to continue making your way out to the sunlight go to 250.

*Rather nerdy reference, i know. where's me coat?*
(I helped save b3ta! Craymen, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 9:15, archived)
# As if by magic...
...a linky appeared

Clicky for mp3.

That song gets played at King Of The Boots nights to much acclaim and that brings us back to B3ta.
I know Diffusion is around here now and again. Last I heard he was going to have one of his songs used in the new C4 series of Top 10... which again brings us back to B3ta.

Everything's connected to B3ta now. It's the new game - Sex Degrees of B3ta.
(Ann_Onnymouse, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 9:09, archived)
# Erm.. that was Six Degrees of course
not as if i've got sex on the brain or anything.

(Ann_Onnymouse, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 9:14, archived)
# i thought King of The Boots nights
were no more! I went to a couple recently and they we'r mucho funno, bu then I heard they had been called off!

Please fill me in on details if they are still going ....

b3ta and Boots have much in common, both cutting up original stuff to create something miraculously other
(KingMob, Tue 30 Apr 2002, 9:16, archived)