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# I'd be sick if someone cut my legs off above the knees
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:35, archived)
# What if I gave you lots of morphone and antibiotics?
Could I cut off your legs then?

I suddenly have an excellent idea for them.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:36, archived)
# tell me!
*agogs*
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:38, archived)
# Right.
plasticise them like Dr Von Haagen, then attach them to my bathroom wall and use them as a towel rack.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:39, archived)
# OR
stick them to the back of your car, so they look like they're hanging out of the boot
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:40, archived)
# :-( I no have car.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:41, archived)
# bugger.
ruined an otherwise damn fine plan.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:43, archived)
# I have your car?
I can drive. Ish. Well, I can drive in a straight line.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:44, archived)
# i have no car
and i can't drive.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:45, archived)
# You and I should never get stranded together.
Well, unless there's a car available with keys, and where we need to get to is in a straight line.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:47, archived)
# definitely.
i could probably drive an automatic, i'm fecking lethal on the dodgems
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:48, archived)
# *shudders*
don't like them cars without gears.

and the tiptronic in the VW golf is appalling
(cs192 is sucking on a Koala at, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:49, archived)
# they put tiptronic in a skateboard?
oh how they pander to Johnny racer and his Max Power chums.
(I helped save b3ta! Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:52, archived)
# it's hideous
nice enough car, or at least would be with a proper gearbox.
but you flick it from "D" into tiptronic, nudge it up a gear and wait two minutes for it to happen.
drives fairly well in Sport mode, but you still feel like you've become hemiplegic due to a right sided CVA
(cs192 is sucking on a Koala at, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:55, archived)
# my main reason for wanting to drive
is the bugatti veyron.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:53, archived)
# doesn't come in automatic though
i sincerly hope
(cs192 is sucking on a Koala at, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:54, archived)
# i seriously doubt
they'd sully a car like that by making it automatic
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 17:08, archived)
# 7 speed sequential
semi auto. ( twin clutch but you don't operate it )
(I helped save b3ta! Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 17:15, archived)
# especially when
the engineer who designed the gearbox worked so hard to make it so light. not gonna whack a ton of kit on it so my sister can drive it (can't drive manuals, but has an excuse)
(cs192 is sucking on a Koala at, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 17:16, archived)
# true
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 17:24, archived)
# AMERICA
FTW, it would be like Wilma and loose knees or whatever they were called only this time there might actually be a chance of seeing some girl on girl action. I have 3 cars and a video camera. I feel a plan coming on ;)
(I helped save b3ta! Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:50, archived)
# But if I go to America there will be Americans
and they seem to not like me.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:51, archived)
# that's what guns were invented for
plus it's the movies. We'll just have a giant floppy monster come out of the sea and eat them all ( fuck off Cloverfield )
(I helped save b3ta! Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:53, archived)
# :D
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:55, archived)
# *books tickets*
so, which airport are we going to?
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:52, archived)
# Fucking hell.
You're going to be shagging the gear stick ALL THE WAY, aren't you?

Edit: there are many videos of this on the internets. It looks like far too much hassle for my liking.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:53, archived)
# sex in cars is difficult and uncomfortable
i once put my foot right through the passenger window.
bloody cramp.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:55, archived)
# Don't do it on a motorbike
unless you're VERY sure you've put the stand on.

Also leathers are designed to make you not have sex. Bastards.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:56, archived)
# Barton
Aerodrome ( Lancashire aero club ) is where you will find my executive jet parked
(I helped save b3ta! Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:59, archived)
# One day I will have my license.
Then you won't be able to get me down. THEN I'm going to get a fucking EuroFighter. COME ON.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 17:01, archived)
# I took it up a few years back as a bit of fun
As my mate owned a Cessna 152 and was happy to take me up and teach me for paying half fuel ( he got his hours in for less cost ). Then I became proficient and realised all my hours counted for nothing so I took up my PPL. Not cheap but well worth it seeing as I live near the airport.
(I helped save b3ta! Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 17:06, archived)
# do you has
little packets of salted peanuts?
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 17:04, archived)
# you will get all the
salty supplements you need madam, and be very grateful for it. ;)
(I helped save b3ta! Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 17:08, archived)
# mmmmmm
nuts...
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 17:13, archived)
# only if you replaced them with really cool robot legs
or maybe some kind of hover chair
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:40, archived)
# How about a skateboard?
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:41, archived)
# turned you into Davros?
(I helped save b3ta! mutster101 fell over, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:41, archived)
# no, I'm thinking something more lightweight and floaty
like the Mekon's
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:44, archived)
# It's a skateboard or this lap tray.
Oh I could just plonk you on my mantelpiece. We'll consult you periodically on matters of grave importance.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:46, archived)
# would you leave his undercarriage intact so you could harvest his seed for nefarious purposes?
(I helped save b3ta! mutster101 fell over, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:49, archived)
# Mrs Toast could do that.
We'd keep her on as Ward of the Oracle. She could sleep in the hearth. Toastarella, hah.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:50, archived)
# my word, you have enough dastardly plans to keep comic book supervillians amused for aeons!
(I helped save b3ta! mutster101 fell over, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:52, archived)
# \o/
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:54, archived)
# cosy
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:52, archived)
# I'm taking this as a
'yes Fae please do this you have my full legal permission.'
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 16:57, archived)
# this seems a legitimate interpretation to me.
(I helped save b3ta! mutster101 fell over, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 17:07, archived)
# *consults lawyer*













no
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Sat 23 Feb 2008, 17:09, archived)