![[challenge entry]](/images/board_posticon_c.gif "Challenge Entry: Photoshop money"){kind=small}
Mnyeh
From the Photoshop money challenge. See all 328 entries (closed)
(
Bela Lugosi's Dad,
Fri 23 May 2008, 5:02,
archived)
Romans found that idea quite effective for their troops coinage.*stays in boat*
(
Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs,
Fri 23 May 2008, 5:08,
archived)
i clickclick and wait but is then where,? where, where;;;go home monkey this is doctor dyslexia's fabergé egg, you monkey
(
autofellatio fills the boards with pointless shit,
Fri 23 May 2008, 6:49,
archived)
Yes, does seem a little thin this eve...In the regular course of events the southern hemisphere would in its turn
be subjected to a severe Glacial period, with the northern hemisphere
rendered warmer; and then the southern temperate forms would invade the
equatorial lowlands. The northern forms which had before been left on the
mountains would now descend and mingle with the southern forms. These
latter, when the warmth returned, would return to their former homes,
leaving some few species on the mountains, and carrying southward with
them some of the northern temperate forms which had descended from their
mountain fastnesses.
(be subjected to a severe Glacial period, with the northern hemisphere
rendered warmer; and then the southern temperate forms would invade the
equatorial lowlands. The northern forms which had before been left on the
mountains would now descend and mingle with the southern forms. These
latter, when the warmth returned, would return to their former homes,
leaving some few species on the mountains, and carrying southward with
them some of the northern temperate forms which had descended from their
mountain fastnesses.
Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs,
Fri 23 May 2008, 6:59,
archived)
THIS IS WANKTALK YOU HEMISPHIST.SO THIS ONE TIME I WENT TO THE LOCAL DRIVE-THROUGH WITH MY FRIEND NIGEL AND HIS BROTHER PATRICK. PATRICK WAS DYING OF ANAL CANCER AND HE WANTED A CHICKEN SANDWICH BUT NIGEL AND I JUST WANTED MILKSHAKES. PATRICK GOT THE SPINS WHEN HE WAS IN A MOVING VEHICLE FROM HIS ASS-MEDICATION SO HE WAS LYING IN THE BACK SEAT. THE WOMAN WHO TOOK OUR ORDER ASKED IF WE WANTED FRIES AND WE ALL SAID "HELL NO! THE FRIES HERE TASTE LIKE SHIT!" AND SHE GOT MAD. I THINK SHE WAS THE SAME WOMAN WHO TOOK OUR MONEY WHILE WE WAITED FOR THE FOOD.
THE MILKSHAKES CAME BUT WE HAD TO WAIT FOR THE CHICKEN SANDWICH. PATRICK STARTED TO BITCH AT US TO LAY ON THE HORN BECAUSE HE WAS HUNGRY. WE DID AND THEN THE CARS BEHIND US STARTED BEEPING TOO BECAUSE THEY THOUGHT WE HAD GOT ALL OUR FOOD. THE WOMAN HANDED US THE SANDWICH AND RUDELY TOLD US TO LAY OFF THE HORN AND TO MOVE ON. BEFORE NIGEL GOT THE CAR IN GEAR PATRICK TOOK A BITE OF THE SANDWICH AND SAID "THIS SANDWICH TASTES LIKE SHIT! IT'S MOULDY! FUCK THIS!" SO NIGEL REACHED OUT AND KNOCKED ON THE WINDOW OF THE DRIVE-THROUGH.
THE SAME ANGRY WOMAN CAME BACK AND SAID "I SAID MOVE!" AND PATRICK STARTED YELLING AT HER FROM THE BACK SEAT. SHE COULDN'T SEE HIM AND WAS BENDING HER HEAD OUT THE WINDOW OF THE DRIVE-THROUGH TO LOOK AROUND TO SEE WHO WAS YELLING. FINALLY HE STUCK HIS FOOT OUT THE CAR WINDOW AND SAID "LOOK HERE YOU STUPID FUCK! I'M IN THE GODDAMN CAR!" SHE SLAMMED THE WINDOW SHUT AND YELLED "DON'T BE SO FUCKING RUDE!" BUT WE COULD BARELY HEAR HER THROUGH THE GLASS. NIGEL KNOCKED ON HER WINDOW AGAIN AND SAID "THE SANDWICH IS RANCID, WE WANT ANOTHER ONE." SHE SAID "OH NO, IT'S FINE AND YOU HAVE TO MOVE YOUR CAR, WE'RE CLOSED NOW." "NO FUCKING WAY!" YELLED PATRICK FROM THE BACK SEAT, SITTING UP A LITTLE. FAST-FOOD WOMAN SAID "YOU BETTER GET OUT OF HERE OR I'M CALLING THE MANAGER." WE ALL STARTED TO LAUGH.
SHE LEFT THE WINDOW AND THE MANAGER SHOWED UP AND WE RECOGNISED HIM FROM HIGH SCHOOL - HE'D DROPPED OUT TO BECOME A MODEL IN THE LAST YEAR. I GUESS HE DIDN'T MAKE IT SO HE BECAME THE MANAGER OF STICKY FRIES. HE ALSO LIKED WHAM! A LOT AND HAD HIGHLIGHTS IN HIS HAIR. HE YELLED AT US TO LEAVE OR HE WAS GOING TO CALL THE POLICE. "I'M GONNA CALL THE COPS ON YOU!" HE YELLED AND WE TRIED TO EXPLAIN ABOUT THE RANCID SANDWICH. HE SAID HE DIDN'T CARE AND THEN PATRICK CALLED THE COUNTER WOMAN A CUNT AND SHE MUST HAVE HEARD BECAUSE SHE RAN BACK INTO VIEW AND STARTED HOLLERING OUT THE WINDOW OF THE DRIVE-THROUGH AT US, AND CALLED US A BUNCH OF LOW-LIFES.
"HAHA!" WE LAUGHED, "WE ARE LOW-LIFES! BUT AT LEAST WE DON'T WORK THE MIDNIGHT SHIFT AT STICKY FRIES AND LISTEN TO NON-STOP WHAM! TAPES WHILE WE MOP THE FLOOR AFTER CLOSING!" COUNTER WOMAN JUST STARED AT US IN DISBELIEF BECAUSE WE'D OBVIOUSLY HIT A BULLSEYE WITH THAT COMMENT. THEN PATRICK THREW THE CHICKEN SANDWICH OUT THE WINDOW OF THE CAR, THROUGH THE WINDOW OF THE DRIVE-THROUGH AND HIT THE WOMAN IN THE SIDE OF THE HEAD. SHE STARTED SCREAMING AGAIN AND NIGEL DROPPED THE CAR INTO GEAR AND WE PEELED OUT, LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY.
WE DROVE HOME AND MADE PATRICK A GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICH AND WOKE EVERYBODY UP LAUGHING ABOUT OUR NIGHT. PATRICK DIED ABOUT THREE WEEKS LATER BUT I DON'T THINK IT WAS THE RANCID CHICKEN.
(THE MILKSHAKES CAME BUT WE HAD TO WAIT FOR THE CHICKEN SANDWICH. PATRICK STARTED TO BITCH AT US TO LAY ON THE HORN BECAUSE HE WAS HUNGRY. WE DID AND THEN THE CARS BEHIND US STARTED BEEPING TOO BECAUSE THEY THOUGHT WE HAD GOT ALL OUR FOOD. THE WOMAN HANDED US THE SANDWICH AND RUDELY TOLD US TO LAY OFF THE HORN AND TO MOVE ON. BEFORE NIGEL GOT THE CAR IN GEAR PATRICK TOOK A BITE OF THE SANDWICH AND SAID "THIS SANDWICH TASTES LIKE SHIT! IT'S MOULDY! FUCK THIS!" SO NIGEL REACHED OUT AND KNOCKED ON THE WINDOW OF THE DRIVE-THROUGH.
THE SAME ANGRY WOMAN CAME BACK AND SAID "I SAID MOVE!" AND PATRICK STARTED YELLING AT HER FROM THE BACK SEAT. SHE COULDN'T SEE HIM AND WAS BENDING HER HEAD OUT THE WINDOW OF THE DRIVE-THROUGH TO LOOK AROUND TO SEE WHO WAS YELLING. FINALLY HE STUCK HIS FOOT OUT THE CAR WINDOW AND SAID "LOOK HERE YOU STUPID FUCK! I'M IN THE GODDAMN CAR!" SHE SLAMMED THE WINDOW SHUT AND YELLED "DON'T BE SO FUCKING RUDE!" BUT WE COULD BARELY HEAR HER THROUGH THE GLASS. NIGEL KNOCKED ON HER WINDOW AGAIN AND SAID "THE SANDWICH IS RANCID, WE WANT ANOTHER ONE." SHE SAID "OH NO, IT'S FINE AND YOU HAVE TO MOVE YOUR CAR, WE'RE CLOSED NOW." "NO FUCKING WAY!" YELLED PATRICK FROM THE BACK SEAT, SITTING UP A LITTLE. FAST-FOOD WOMAN SAID "YOU BETTER GET OUT OF HERE OR I'M CALLING THE MANAGER." WE ALL STARTED TO LAUGH.
SHE LEFT THE WINDOW AND THE MANAGER SHOWED UP AND WE RECOGNISED HIM FROM HIGH SCHOOL - HE'D DROPPED OUT TO BECOME A MODEL IN THE LAST YEAR. I GUESS HE DIDN'T MAKE IT SO HE BECAME THE MANAGER OF STICKY FRIES. HE ALSO LIKED WHAM! A LOT AND HAD HIGHLIGHTS IN HIS HAIR. HE YELLED AT US TO LEAVE OR HE WAS GOING TO CALL THE POLICE. "I'M GONNA CALL THE COPS ON YOU!" HE YELLED AND WE TRIED TO EXPLAIN ABOUT THE RANCID SANDWICH. HE SAID HE DIDN'T CARE AND THEN PATRICK CALLED THE COUNTER WOMAN A CUNT AND SHE MUST HAVE HEARD BECAUSE SHE RAN BACK INTO VIEW AND STARTED HOLLERING OUT THE WINDOW OF THE DRIVE-THROUGH AT US, AND CALLED US A BUNCH OF LOW-LIFES.
"HAHA!" WE LAUGHED, "WE ARE LOW-LIFES! BUT AT LEAST WE DON'T WORK THE MIDNIGHT SHIFT AT STICKY FRIES AND LISTEN TO NON-STOP WHAM! TAPES WHILE WE MOP THE FLOOR AFTER CLOSING!" COUNTER WOMAN JUST STARED AT US IN DISBELIEF BECAUSE WE'D OBVIOUSLY HIT A BULLSEYE WITH THAT COMMENT. THEN PATRICK THREW THE CHICKEN SANDWICH OUT THE WINDOW OF THE CAR, THROUGH THE WINDOW OF THE DRIVE-THROUGH AND HIT THE WOMAN IN THE SIDE OF THE HEAD. SHE STARTED SCREAMING AGAIN AND NIGEL DROPPED THE CAR INTO GEAR AND WE PEELED OUT, LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY.
WE DROVE HOME AND MADE PATRICK A GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICH AND WOKE EVERYBODY UP LAUGHING ABOUT OUR NIGHT. PATRICK DIED ABOUT THREE WEEKS LATER BUT I DON'T THINK IT WAS THE RANCID CHICKEN.
postbear has metal knees,
Fri 23 May 2008, 7:32,
archived)
MY ADRENALIN WAS AT LEVEL 9000 WHEN I TYPED IT.AND I TYPED IT WITH MY COCK BECAUSE I WAS LOOKING AT A NAKED PICTURE OF DIXON.
( postbear has metal knees,
Fri 23 May 2008, 7:42,
archived)
soft onfor the pinky shift?
(
Zank Frappa Who let the lefties in?,
Fri 23 May 2008, 16:29,
archived)
JESUS FUCK! ARE ALL OF YOU PEOPLE STUNNED OR SOMETHING? THIS IS VITAL LORE!I WILL BUST SOME ASS WIDE OPEN HERE.
( postbear has metal knees,
Fri 23 May 2008, 7:40,
archived)
CHICKEN SANDWICH OF DOOOOOM!Hahaha!
( Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs,
Fri 23 May 2008, 7:49,
archived)
BASED ON A TRUE STORY.I ONLY MADE UP A FEW MINOR PARTS AND I CHANGED MY FRIEND'S NAME TO NIGEL BECAUSE HE GOT WEIRDED OUT WHEN HIS BROTHER DIED. PATRICK DID THROW THE SANDWICH AND HIT HER IN THE HEAD LIKE THAT, THOUGH, AND HE WAS SPRAWLED OUT IN THE BACK SEAT. HE HAD A GREAT ARM.
( postbear has metal knees,
Fri 23 May 2008, 7:51,
archived)
Handy skill. If one has a lot of rancid sandwiches at hand that is. Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs,
Fri 23 May 2008, 7:56,
archived)
I BOUGHT A SACK OF AVOCADOES A FEW WEEKS AGO AND THEY WERE ALL STRINGY AND ROTTEN INSIDE.THE SUPERMARKET WOULDN'T GIVE ME A REFUND SO I'VE BEEN STEALING STUFF FROM THEM EVER SINCE. SOME THINGS I JUST PALM OR POCKET, BUT I ALSO BUY PACKS OF VEGETABLES THAT ARE IN CARDBOARD CONTAINERS WITH SARAN WRAP OVER THEM, AND HAVE $1 MARKED ON THEM.
WHEN I GET HOME I EMPTY OUT THE VEGETABLES AND BRING THE CONTAINERS BACK TO THE STORE THE NEXT TIME AND FILL THEM HALFWAY UP WITH EXPENSIVE SHIT THEN THROW MUSHROOMS OR BRUSSEL SPROUTS OVERTOP. I HAVE ABOUT TEN TINY EXPENSIVE CONTAINERS OF NASAL SPRAY AND A WHOLE PILE OF WEIRD ESSENTIAL OILS FROM DOING THIS NOW.
I HATE BRUSSEL SPROUTS SO I END UP SWATTING THEM INTO THE 3-DOORS-DOWN NEIGHBOUR'S YARD WITH MY SQUASH RACQUET. I DON'T USE NASAL SPRAY EITHER, BUT IT'S THE PRINCIPLE OF THE THING.
(WHEN I GET HOME I EMPTY OUT THE VEGETABLES AND BRING THE CONTAINERS BACK TO THE STORE THE NEXT TIME AND FILL THEM HALFWAY UP WITH EXPENSIVE SHIT THEN THROW MUSHROOMS OR BRUSSEL SPROUTS OVERTOP. I HAVE ABOUT TEN TINY EXPENSIVE CONTAINERS OF NASAL SPRAY AND A WHOLE PILE OF WEIRD ESSENTIAL OILS FROM DOING THIS NOW.
I HATE BRUSSEL SPROUTS SO I END UP SWATTING THEM INTO THE 3-DOORS-DOWN NEIGHBOUR'S YARD WITH MY SQUASH RACQUET. I DON'T USE NASAL SPRAY EITHER, BUT IT'S THE PRINCIPLE OF THE THING.
postbear has metal knees,
Fri 23 May 2008, 8:03,
archived)
Hahahahabrilliant stories 'THE SANDWICH IS RANCID, WE WANT ANOTHER ONE' is going to be said the very next time someone gives me a sandwich :)
(
charlie brown doesn't have a dog but still enjoys shitbagging,
Fri 23 May 2008, 8:01,
archived)
YOU HAVE TO LOUDLY SING A LINE FROM A WHAM! SONG AFTERWARD OR PATRICK'S GHOST WILL APPEAR AND EAT YOUR SANDWICH.IT'S HAPPENED.
( postbear has metal knees,
Fri 23 May 2008, 8:05,
archived)
person: here is your sandwichme: THE SANDWICH IS RANCID, WE WANT ANOTHER ONE
person: Oh... I'm sorry, try this one
me: "I'M YOUR MAN"
person: ???
Patricks ghost: hungry but a little more at peace
(person: Oh... I'm sorry, try this one
me: "I'M YOUR MAN"
person: ???
Patricks ghost: hungry but a little more at peace
charlie brown doesn't have a dog but still enjoys shitbagging,
Fri 23 May 2008, 8:17,
archived)
I LIKE "WAKE ME UP BEFORE YOU GO-GO" MORE.I USED TO HAVE THE 45 OF IT (YEAH, RECORDS, I'M OLD) AND I'D PLAY IT ON 33. SLOWED DOWN, WHAM! SOUNDS LIKE OLD BLACK MEN SINGING DEEP BASS, SO I'D PLAY IT FOR PEOPLE AND TELL THEM IT WAS THE ORIGINAL BY THE FOUR MOONBEAMS OR SOME SHIT AND WHAM! HAD JUST COVERED IT, BADLY. SOME STUPID PEOPLE BELIEVED ME, EVEN IF THEY LOOKED AT THE WRITING CREDIT FOR GEORGE MICHAEL AND THE GUY EVERYONE'S FORGOTTEN ABOUT. I'D TELL THEM THAT WHITE ARTISTS ALWAYS STOLE FROM BLACK MUSICIANS AND THEY'D BELIEVE ME BECAUSE THEY WERE STUPID.
( postbear has metal knees,
Fri 23 May 2008, 8:23,
archived)
This is a truly beautiful story.
gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social,
Fri 23 May 2008, 8:43,
archived)
I WROTE IT FOR YOU AND DIXON AND I WILL SING IT AT YOUR WEDDING.FULL METAL FALSETTO.
( postbear has metal knees,
Fri 23 May 2008, 8:49,
archived)