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# I have problems with those places now
as I used to have to go with my (very ex) best friend and watch her shovel spoon after spoonful of her version of salad* into her gaping maw.

*blue cheese dressing with croutons and lettuce floating about in it.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:33, archived)
# I think it's the "very ex" part that makes this story all the more interesting :D
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:35, archived)
# She's a cunt. C-U-N-T cunt.
But I can be vindictively female now and just go HAHAHAHAHAHA she got fat and I got thinner.

*puts her grown up hat on again* sorry for that.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:37, archived)
# crazy outbursts like that make life all the more fun :D
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:40, archived)
# She really did though
and one of my mates saw her down the pub at the weekend in tight leather trousers. Eewwwwwwwwwwwwww.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:41, archived)
# hahahahah, there isn't much funnier than someone fat trying to wear tight leather pants...
the way it actually creaks under the strain...
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:43, archived)
# I've saved the best bit
TUCKED IN to tight stiletto boots.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:45, archived)
# arse like two badly parked volkswagon beetles
(I helped save b3ta! Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:46, archived)
# I'm still a bit of a chub.
But I'm not being hypocritical when I say oh my goodness yes. Bin bag full of cottage cheese.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:46, archived)
# oh, dear me - no
that's not good.
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:46, archived)
# If you do that
you have to have shapely legs. And that's not her area. Massive rollerblind bosoms, yes. Shapely legs, no.

Sorry, I'm being a right bitch this morning.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:47, archived)
# oooooh, VERY SEXY!
*rubs thighs furiously*
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:49, archived)
# O_o
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:51, archived)
# I can't help reading 'ex' as 'fat'
(I helped save b3ta! Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:37, archived)
# She is now, she wasn't then.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:39, archived)
# you should have gone to specsavers
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:39, archived)
# metafori.. mettafour.. metafive.. figuratively speaking
(I helped save b3ta! Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:41, archived)
# *bokes up previously lovely bacon and egg sarnie*
Blue cheese dressing -eeewwwww.......
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:36, archived)
# Sorry love!
The Boosh barely redeemed themselves, the songs at the end were ok, and little Dave Brown's a rock god, but apart from that it was, not to put too fine a point on it, gash.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:38, archived)
# That's a bit poo.
:(

I'm currently debating getting tickets for Mr Izzard, but last time round he was, quite frankly, shite, so I'm very unsure...
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:42, archived)
# The wife said that when he went to see sexie.
I want to go and see Dylan Moran. He's one of the few people who really makes me laugh.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:43, archived)
# ross noble!
stewart lee!

doug stanhope!

these are all good peoples. I'd link you some but your at work and your work hates you :(
(I helped save b3ta! arrangedletters, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:50, archived)
# They do.
For you- youtube or whatever:

Michael McIntyre
Greg Davies
Russell Howard
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:54, archived)
# I love him.
He's off his mong.
(I helped save b3ta! Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:51, archived)
# People frown if you try to ride them round town now.
Bastards. I'm an equal opportunities employer.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:53, archived)
# heheh
(I helped save b3ta! Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:56, archived)
# Joey Deacon was on telly a couple of days ago
just for a second. Happy birthday blue peter or something, they showed him having a lovely big old smile, bless him.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:58, archived)
# oooh you off to the Boosh
lucky you
(I helped save b3ta! boff FL OZ, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:37, archived)
# No, that was last night, I need to change it.
And no, not at all, as it happens. Shame.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:39, archived)
# I saw review and wasnt good, hoped they were wrong
still I shall go to you tube and just listen to eels song over and over and over and over...
(I helped save b3ta! boff FL OZ, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:42, archived)
# Lots of things were wrong
including the fact that most of the action took place on the front fucking 3rd of the stage. They totally ignored the line marks.

Top shelf? Don't give me 'top shelf', you little wanker, we've barely seen you tonight.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:46, archived)
# I wouldn't go if I were her.
I heard the songs at the end are ok, and little Dave Brown's a rock god, but apart from that it is, not to put too fine a point on it, gash.
(I helped save b3ta! Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:42, archived)
# Wise words. I bet whoever said that is really sexy and talented.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:44, archived)
# But of course!
(I helped save b3ta! Geoff the Clownfish You know Myra, some people might think you're cute, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:45, archived)
# :D you're full of wise words today
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:48, archived)
# Its all gone deja vu
Im stuck in a time continuum loop, but I wanted to stuck in the one with the girl I used to work with with prize norks
(I helped save b3ta! boff FL OZ, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:49, archived)
# White hole! Spewing time back into the universe!
So what is it?
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 21 Oct 2008, 9:51, archived)