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# Ah man!
You're totally better than Turk Nurse! Now all you have to do is move to either Queen Mary's in Sidcup or Queen Elizabeth in Woolwich and we're totally on!
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 1:37, archived)
# When I did my first job I was desperately hoping it would be like Scrubs. My initials are JD and my best friend was black and doing surgery.
Sadly it was all boring instead like Grey's Anatomy :-(
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 1:40, archived)
# That sucks dude!
If you want excitement, seriously, move to a hospital near me. I am always getting into whacky scrapes! I think next time I will probably damage my legs in some way as they are totally overdue!
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 1:42, archived)
# Good idea!
Sadly I'm stuck in Brum for the next 3 years but you're welcome to send me pictures of your injuries to keep me entertained.
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 1:48, archived)
# What drugs do you give people when they get superglue on their fingers and then use sandpaper to remove some of it and it hurts like fuck?
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 1:44, archived)
# A drugs test.
You can take yours now.
Also, have some morphine. Everyone else is.
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 1:45, archived)
# On the plus side I'm now missing a fingerprint
What crimes shall I commit using only my left forefinger?
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 1:46, archived)
# Rapes
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 1:59, archived)
# Steal a thimble.
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 2:10, archived)
# Or one of those monster finger puppets made of rubber.
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 2:11, archived)
# Or Fingermouse.
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 2:11, archived)
# Or a freakishly large straw.
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 2:12, archived)
# No, no. no!
I know what you should steal!

A piece of string!
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 2:12, archived)
# Oh wait!
You should totally steal loads of those jelly wedding rings! You can get like a thousand of those on one finger! That would totally be £10 of booty!
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 2:13, archived)
# I like this idea most.
But I do like Fingermouse.
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 2:21, archived)
# Then do it!
DO IT NOW!
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 2:39, archived)
# Poke a badger to death.
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 2:20, archived)
# That sounds dangerous.
Although you are a doctor...
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 2:24, archived)
# It's fairly safe as long as you remember to go for the eyes first.
(, Wed 7 Oct 2009, 2:25, archived)