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# this can't be kosher
(I helped save b3ta! Rapitinui get in the cage and I'll give you a treat, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 0:36, archived)
# although they chew the cud
they do not have a split hoof

although i never understood why a lack of cloven hoof affects the cleanliness of an animal
(I helped save b3ta! Spunky McPunk not dead yet, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 0:42, archived)
# We all know rabbits can talk right
but did you know it's only in movies and books and on tv. They don't really talk in real life. No matter how long you sit there.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 0:44, archived)
# you could sit there until the species evolves
into massively intelligent talking creatures.

i'm gonna try it
(I helped save b3ta! Spunky McPunk not dead yet, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 0:49, archived)
# What if they don't?
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 0:52, archived)
# Indeed.
There may be no selection pressure for evolving speech.
Rabbits might lack certain keystone physiological features that would be necessary for speech development.
Random drift in their DNA might not activate enough dormant promoters left over from retroviral fragments.

What then?
(I helped save b3ta! The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 1:04, archived)
# Or they may just be the perfect animal already
No, wait. That's cockroaches.
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 1:05, archived)
# Hit it with a stick
until it says 'ow'
(I helped save b3ta! Steerable_forehead Our Lady of Blessed Acceleration,don't fail me now, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 1:20, archived)
# Take a good book to read while waiting
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 1:09, archived)
# Or an infinite number of monkeys and typewriters.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 1:46, archived)
# Yay for Leviticus 11:6
Either the writers of Leviticus quite liked rabbits and had a pet lop-ear called Flopsy, or Wiki might be right.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kosher_animals#Origin
Alternative theory : Due to a mistranslation, the Oannes, teachers of civilisation to primitive humanity, were in fact part rabbit. The humans thus declared rabbits sacred teachers of humanity and off-limits at lunchtime.
Edit : plus, hares are coprophages which might upset people.
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 0:54, archived)
# Fuck. I wonder what Rhinocerous tastes like.
(I helped save b3ta! The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 1:06, archived)
# *resisting the temptation to say "It gives you the horn"*
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 1:08, archived)
# But you did just say it. You just put "resisting the temptation to say..." before it.
It's a bit like starting a sentence with "I'm not X, but..."
(I helped save b3ta! The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 1:12, archived)
# You saw right through my cunning ruse.
I have nowhere to hide.
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 1:20, archived)
# Don't order it in a restaurant
They'll charge you a lot.
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 1:09, archived)
# I have been charged by a rhino!
We just got away in our stupid suzuki jeep thing. I had some great pictures though.
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 1:10, archived)
# :D
(I helped save b3ta! The Alchemist king of the needlessly complicated, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 1:11, archived)
# Would posting Windy Mullah help?
(I helped save b3ta! An Egg ,D, Wed 24 Mar 2010, 0:48, archived)