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This is a question Annoying Partners

As a recent divorcee, it would be churlish to reveal what annoys me the most about my ex, apart from that unfortunate business with the crinkle-cut beetroot which tipped us over the edge. So, what winds you up about your significant other? If you have no partner, tell us about workmates. If you have no workmates, improvise with an annoying tramp

(, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 14:47)
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My girlfriend moans if I leave the toilet seat up.
So, i've started leaving it down.
Now she's complaining about the amount shit on the top of the seat.

I just can't win.
(, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 15:11, 11 replies)
i totaly feel for you dude

(, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 15:14, closed)
Get one of those slow-closing toilet seats...
...then you can turn the house rules into a game of Finish Your Wee Before The Slow-Closing Toilet Seat Closes.
(, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 15:17, closed)
Will do.

(, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 18:33, closed)
But what about
the little squirts of wee at the end? They're bound to splash the seat!
(, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 20:23, closed)
...into the sink
(, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 21:19, closed)
Stick a daffodil in it
Wimmin luv flowers
(, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 15:26, closed)
This maybe an old joke
but it proper made me laugh!
(, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 15:53, closed)
So why don't us blokes ever complain about the toilet seat being left down when we want a slash?
You can show mathematically that it's more likely for blokes to find the seat down when we want to piss, than for a women to find it up. Mostly becuase women go to the bog more often than men.
(, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 16:17, closed)
Women I have known complain that sitting on the bog with the seat up gives them a nasty shock and a cold arse. Quite why they don't notice the seat is up until they sit down I don't know - perhaps they should get into the habit of looking.

Alternatively, women could find a way of walking into the bathroom face-first rather than arse first, so they have the chance to adjust the seat to their preferred position.

For those of their number who find the thought of touching a toilet seat disgusting, there's bogroll. And the knowledge that men tend to lift the toilet seat in order not to get piss on it.

I always found the best rule of thumb is to leave the seat the way you found it - if it's up, leave it up; if down, leave it down.

Because, given the choice, I'd say she'd find it more disgusting to have a momentarily cold arse than a piss-soaked bathroom rug and wet shins.
(, Thu 4 Aug 2011, 17:48, closed)
No excuse for not seeing it's up
They usually go in fucking twos, you'd think one of them would spot it.
(, Sat 6 Aug 2011, 20:14, closed)
Is it just me?
I leave the seat down and piss through it.
(, Mon 8 Aug 2011, 9:30, closed)

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