I wouldn't call her my partner, but
my curent squeeze is a right annoying hussy.

You would think that with the totally over generous allowance I give her, and being seen on the arm of one of the most highly paid city traders in London, she would be grateful enough to keep her whiney gob shut. It's not like she could earn more working, because she really is completely brainless. I can see her now, through the glass, trying to get her phone camera to work - she hasn't got a clue the dense stumpet.

Fantastic body though, and sucks like a dyson, but as soon as she opens her mouth the dopey tart sounds so soppy it drives me up the wall - "oh it's so sad about those starving Africans" - yes if they weren't so bloody lazy they wouldn't be so hungry, although obviously they would never be as successful as someone like me. I have taken to eating on the balcony, with the patio doors shut, so I can perv over her figure as she gets dressed without having to listen to that annoying whine. I can read the paper in peace and also keep one eye on the Porsche while enjoying my fresh croissant and glass of chablis. Did I mention I was really rich?
(Mystery_Machine, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 14:55, 4 replies)

*puts high horse back in its stable*
*admits to nearly being got good & proper*

*slinks off*
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 15:02, closed)

^ this...
*click*
(Sir Itchalot has a very self-referential signature, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 16:45, closed)

You KEEP AN EYE ON your Porsche?
You appalling pleb. Anyone with half an ounce of class would have a private security force to watch over it.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 5 Aug 2011, 20:05, closed)

You peon.
It's only a Porsche for God's sake! That's what I gave to the gardener so he could go and pick up manure from the royal stables. Wouldn't be seen dead in one myself.
( SteamedCleaner, Sat 6 Aug 2011, 3:07, closed)