Behind The Mask
Back in October 2005, I’d just split up with my then girlfriend and was feeling pretty low about myself.

So I did what any self-respecting male would do in my position – I bought myself a pair of Adidas tracksuit bottoms, a baggy black hooded top, a selection of fake plastic gold chains, a toy Uzi that sprayed water instead of bullets, and went to a Halloween gig in north London wearing a home-made 50 Cent mask.

Having eventually persuaded the door staff that I wasn’t a total psycho, I went inside the venue to find others dressed in Halloween attire, but to my surprise, no-one else dressed as a gangster rapper who survived a gun battle in which he sustained nine gunshot wounds.

I was getting rather a lot of strange yet not unfriendly looks, most notably from the band that was currently playing. The lead singer announced mid-set that they had a very special guest in the audience that they wanted to invite onstage with them to perform during their next song.

Before I knew what was happening, I was hauled onto the stage with the band, to a loud burst of applause. I don’t remember quite what I did next, it was all something of a blur, but I do remember busting a few moves of a highly dubious nature, which included dry humping the drum riser and inadvertently falling off the stage to cheers and laughter from the audience.

To my utter amazement, I spent the remainder of the evening chatting to some very friendly young ladies, who seemed inexplicably impressed by my earlier onstage buffoonery, and several telephone numbers were exchanged.

Although I didn’t think anything of it at the time, one of those casually exchanged telephone numbers resulted in a happy and loving relationship which is still going strong some four years and three months later, and we’ve been living together for the last couple of years.

So I guess it pays to be a complete idiot sometimes.
(tricyclic_looper, Thu 14 Jan 2010, 17:58, 1 reply)

Have you taken the mask off yet?

(thefuckestuppest cheapened this, on, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:54, closed)