Pearoast
While I live in the arse end of Cheshire now (it's all shit except for Spike, who is awesome, etc), I'm actually from a shithole town called Skelmersdale, no doubt some of you will have heard of it. It's a very easy place to get round, as long as you're looking for a landmark, as it's all very well signposted. Signs point to Asda, the Concourse, the Swimming Pool, etc etc. It's the final one that this story refers to.

When we were younger, the sign saying "Swimming Pool -" was often changed a little, so it would say "Swim in Poo -", which is quite clearly genius. The sign would be fixed every month or so, and would usually last around 3-4 months before being changed again. Sadly, this stopped occuring after a while, maybe the vandals decided there was more fun activities, such as drinking on street corners, or fighting.

Earlier this year, a pretty pissed Agnostic is travelling on the bus back to his friends house, when he discovers he'll have to walk the final mile home. Unimpressed, and unable to call for a lift (due to dead phone), I started to walk. I had barely gone 5 minutes from the bus, when I noticed the old sign standing proud at the side of the road. I was rather disappointed to discover it was also still spelt correctly, just not funny!

So what did I do? Keys out of pocket, start scratching away the letters. Cars pass by, undaunted I continue.

Barely 5 minutes went by before I stood back to proudly observe my creation, and laugh at the sign, inviting you to "Swim in Po -".

Fuck, went too far.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 11:31, 1 reply)

On a related note
I was thinking only this morning that, if they were printed in the right font and colour, posters about "back problems" could easily be converted to "cock problems".

I've also corrected a few "TO LET" signs by putting back the missing "I"...
(Vice Admiral Sir Charles Cockbrush KCB MBE DSO, who is finding it increasingly difficult to log into b3ta.com wants to duck your aunt and kick your puppy, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 15:16, closed)