I wouldn't say it was least successful. Just deliciously frustrating.
THIS IS A REPOST. JUST IN CASE RINGOFYRE BRIGADIER MISSED THAT PART.

There was this one time...

Her name was Jennifer, we'd been workmates since we were at school and then both worked near each other for a few years after that so we regularly had lunch or caught up for after work drinks.

Jen was a pale, slim and that almost blonde ginge. Attractive, but not really my type. But fuck me did she have a vicious sense of humour. Not unlike myself.
We occasionally came across each other socially and when we did it was always a hoot but nothing ever really happened beyond a few drunken, slurred "I luv ya mate"s.

One night Jen came over to mine after breaking up with her bf a few weeks prior. I was single at the time and all of my house-mates were out for the evening. We had a nice meal - I cooked carbonara from memory and then we plonked on the couch talking.

"I'd love a neck rub" she said. It wasn't the 1st time and hey the beers were hitting the spot for me. After a while she lifted her blouse up and asked me to continue on her back.
Eyebrows raised but what the hell. I wasn't brave or keen enouhg at this point to tell her that to do it properly I'd need to undo her bra. After a while she turned around (now just in her bra) and offered to return the favour. I got the cushions off the couch, put down a towel, got some baby oil, lay down on my tummy, took my shirt off and told her to go to town.

For a 5', skinny, pale thing she had some nice strong fingers. I was almost dozing off when she piped up "My turn." Off came her bra with very little self-consciousness and after she lay down I straddled her (now I noticed) pert bum and started rubbing baby oil into her back with great gusto.
I had to address the elephant in the room eventually - "Umm, Jen I got a raging hardon. Sorry but you know, biology etc.". "I know." she purred. Then she rolled over and we kissed - it just seemed to happen.

"I think we need to take this out of the lounge-room" I said. She said "I don't mind what we do tonight but nothing penetrative." OK. I tidied the lounge up and walked into my bedroom finding her naked on the bed. "Leave your boxers on" she told me as I got undressed.
We kissed and then I fondled her small pert boobs and then sucked on the ripe little nubbins. She laid right back, I put a pillow under the small of her back, spread her lips and then then started slurping, sucking & licking.
I must have felt her shudder about 4 times before I tried to push a couple of fingers into her to really finish her off (there is a rough spot just behind the pubic mound on the inside of a ladies vajizzle that for every woman I have touched has made them buck their hips like a bronco - particularly whilst sucking on their engorged clit - call it a g-spot, whatever, I just know it fucking works). She stopped me so I climbed on top of her and ground against her wettness with the tip and shaft of my cock behind my [silk] boxers. We just rolled around for hours like that. I think that was one of the best frottage experiences I have ever had.

After a while we rolled over and dozed, then we had a shower where we slowly washed each other quite carefully - the way one partner gives the other a bed bath when they're crook.

Not once did she touch my cock in a randy manner, I didn't even cum that night (trust me it didn't take me long to knock 1 out afterwards).
My wanking fantasy: if only my cock had slipped completely out of the top or between the "pee-hole" fold of my boxers and I'd been able to 'inadvertently' thrust myself into Jen's ripe, wet ted.

We had lunch at work a couple of days later with nary a mention of that night. I ended up in her bed a couple of months later where I again treated her to some very enjoyable mouth & tongue entertainment. But that was all.

About 6 mths. later she rang me - we'd both taken different jobs and drifted apart and she told me - "I want you to come over and fuck me senseless". "Sorry", I told her "I'm kinda busy.", she asked me if I had someone there with me. I told her yes. She asked me if it was someone special, I replied in the positive...

That someone special is gonna be home from work in an hour or so and our daughter is itching to show her the library books we got today.
EDIT:The above is in italics to denote something occurring in the present day and no longer in the past.
Whilst I'm at it just to be very clear - at no point was this rape or a fantasy about rape.


Haven't seen, nor heard from Jen since. Oh the times I've had imagining.

Length: Well the old fella was well and truly poking out the top of my boxers.
TBH If I were single & she rang me today. I'd probably say no.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Thu 17 Oct 2013, 21:52, 6 replies)

Good luck, Albert.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 17 Oct 2013, 22:09, closed)

Not enough watersports.

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Thu 17 Oct 2013, 22:12, closed)

I'm riding a jetski.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 17 Oct 2013, 22:28, closed)

I'm on a motherfucking boat.

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Thu 17 Oct 2013, 22:42, closed)

Is it only me who finds
I once nearly had full sexual intercourse with a woman THIS ISN'T A RAPE FANTASY! a little unsettling.
(ringofyre, Thu 17 Oct 2013, 22:58, closed)

Read the original post and replies you
stupid toad.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Thu 17 Oct 2013, 23:11, closed)

You mean you've posted this very same story before?

(ringofyre, Thu 17 Oct 2013, 23:24, closed)

He only has three stories.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 18 Oct 2013, 7:48, closed)

Compared to your....
EDIT: Now if Brigadier is one of your sockpuppets & he stole my username - doesn't that mean you're talking to yourself?

You clever clogs you!
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Fri 18 Oct 2013, 9:12, closed)

Bet the carbonara had cream in it. Tsk

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Fri 18 Oct 2013, 10:54, closed)

Oh.
Yes.
(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Fri 18 Oct 2013, 11:15, closed)