![This is a question](/images/board_posticon.gif)
Freddie Woo sends us a tale of woe which ends: "I could live with being cheated on. What really got me that there was clearly a third person holding the camera, and the arse pummeling up and down sometimes had a tattoo, sometimes it didn't. I moved out that day." Tell us about how a relationship's come crashing down around you.
( , Thu 12 Sep 2013, 13:18)
« Go Back
![This is a QotW answer](/images/board_posticon.gif)
I had thought my backpacking days were over.
That was until I met James in my new job. James was a company IT guy and all round generally decent chap and he would sit there and quietly absorb the travellers' tales Sarah, another co-worker, and I would share. One company night out, in the pub, James revealed he'd been listening to our tales and wasn't getting any younger and wanted to jack his job in and do the working-visa year-in-Oz thing. I obviously had loved my wandering, did I want to go with him?
There was a problem - I was in a relationship.
Luckily, knowing I was a dromomaniac and that I still had the travel bug in my system, the girlfriend didn't mind if I went. We had phone, we had the internet and could keep in touch. Two other friends had heard about the plans and wanted to quit their jobs too so they could come along (though they'd be joining us four months in) and she'd know I'd be with them. So off James and I went to Oz.
James, it quickly turned out, hadn't been on a holiday without his parents and had never been abroad in his life. He couldn't cook, couldn't do much of anything as it turned out and wouldn't lift a finger to do anything that needed doing. I was the experienced traveller, obviously I had to do everything. Setting him up with the tax authorities? I did it for him. Setting him up with the reciprocal medical aid? I did it for him. I even had to get a spider out of his room at one point. Okay, this *was* Australia and their spiders apparently eat people but this one was tiny.
We soon went our separate ways. I made a new circle of friends via my temporary job and being on my own and ostensibly single, at a glance, I started to get offers from Australian ladies and female backpackers both. However, knowing my girl was waiting for me I informed them, with much regret, that I had a girlfriend and was unavailable. Six or seven girls I knocked back (though one of them was a flake, a tarot card reader had said her future hubbie would be a Brit and I showed up the very next week). The others were wonderful girls though.
I remained faithful, in spite of temptation, in touch with my girlfriend the whole time; enjoying what I imagined would be my last serious bout of travel before settling down.
Funnily enough, things never turn out how you imagine though. I didn't last the whole year, I cut it short with three months still left on my working visa. When I got home the girlfriend had a kid. Not mine either.
( , Thu 12 Sep 2013, 21:20, 36 replies)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
tie dyed daydreamer returns from jolly to find bird-on-hold was shagging someone from the real world
( , Fri 13 Sep 2013, 10:53, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
she was pregnant when I left.
( , Fri 13 Sep 2013, 20:58, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
If you hadn't been holding court as the office Attenborough you might have spotted she was banging the postman
Muppet
( , Fri 13 Sep 2013, 22:55, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
The fact that you're useless at arithmetic merely makes you a fucking spanner.
( , Fri 13 Sep 2013, 23:17, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
It is tempting to add internet wankers to the list though.
( , Sun 15 Sep 2013, 7:21, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
Look. You were floating around like a fart in a trance dreaming of some rose tinted memory of a beach in south east Asia while some bloke in real time was inseminating your bint. you were too self absorbed to see it and thought fucking off with your gay crush was a spiffing wheeze. The outcome comes as no surprise to anyone else here but you.
( , Sun 15 Sep 2013, 1:31, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
If you can't remember what you write and try to change what you said that's not my problem. It merely highlights that you're either (a) thick or (b) a lying cunt. Take your pick sunshine, but you're one or the other.
"You were floating around like a fart in a trance dreaming of some rose tinted memory of a beach in south east Asia "
Ah, this fictional planet you live on where people cheat on other people and always get found out must be quite some place. Because nobody in the history of ever has ever managed to cheat on anybody and get away with it, have they?
Or is the sad fact the fact that you're so desperate to feel superior to somebody, absolutely anybody at all, even online, that your default knee-jerk response is to have a go at somebody based on your own delusional readings and prejudices of what you imagine their situation to be?
I rather think it's that. But continue being a sad, pathetic little wanker, because it sounds like you don't have much better going on in your life if this the high standard of goal you set yourself to achieve.
( , Sun 15 Sep 2013, 7:27, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
its up there to read.
lets go through it slowly for you.
while you were at work, holding court as the worldly traveler, reminiscing about your far flung capers
YOUR MISSUS WAS ALREADY BEING FUCKED BY ANOTHER BLOKE AND WAS PREGNANT BEFORE YOU LEFT
we ALL get that you self absorbed tit
no wonder she clearly wasn't bothered when you toddled off
you're a pompous twat
( , Mon 16 Sep 2013, 18:01, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
I like it when whining, self-indulgent trustafarians get cuckolded by real men.
( , Fri 13 Sep 2013, 10:55, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
( , Fri 13 Sep 2013, 11:17, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
and having one of them piss off for a while, while remaining on the hook, sounded like a great way to avoid making a decision?
( , Fri 13 Sep 2013, 11:36, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
Absolutely anyone who likes to travel = Tarquiny twat
Top middle-class loathing there sir, keep up the fine work.
( , Fri 13 Sep 2013, 21:07, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
Using words like Dromomaniac = Tarquiny twat.
You Tarquiny twat.
( , Fri 13 Sep 2013, 22:05, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
Praps I shud tlk lik n ignrant kunt so u unnerstand, innit?
( , Fri 13 Sep 2013, 23:19, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
Not sure why this is confusing. It's probably a side-effect of you being a tarquinny twat.
( , Fri 13 Sep 2013, 22:36, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
( , Fri 13 Sep 2013, 23:15, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
for people with complexes like yourself. Why don't you and Ranty McRanter bum each other into a higher level of foaming-at-the-chops general indignation at the world and launch your own little keyboard crusade? You sad little internet warriors, you.
( , Fri 13 Sep 2013, 23:25, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
Don't you?
( , Sun 15 Sep 2013, 7:29, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
Or thinking that typing essays of justification on a messageboard makes you look less of a plonker?
( , Sun 15 Sep 2013, 8:48, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
merely serves to underline your capacity for reason.
( , Sun 15 Sep 2013, 16:05, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
But what are we to make of your hilarious Tarquiny username? I bet the other boys in the dorm thought you were such a one, eh?
( , Sun 15 Sep 2013, 21:26, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
but am clicking for a well-told story & your emotional suffering.
( , Fri 13 Sep 2013, 14:35, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
The only thing that riles me about this tale now are the girls I knocked back, any one of whom would probably have been an improvement on my then gf.
( , Sat 14 Sep 2013, 0:28, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
( , Fri 13 Sep 2013, 16:23, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
It will get easier. We won't judge you - it's not that your gay - it's just that your, well, such a total cunt.
( , Sun 15 Sep 2013, 1:35, closed)
![This is a QotW comment](/images/board_posticon.gif)
or so naive as to imagine she'd loiter in the wings for a year while i tossed my way round the opposite side of the globe with some prat from work.
buffoon
( , Mon 16 Sep 2013, 18:06, closed)
« Go Back