we went to madeira once. it was a self-catering villa with its own pool, but sitting in a resort that had a shop, restaurant, bar, family pools etc
and someone had written in the guestbook for our villa:

"amazing on-site restaurant. we ate there every night for 2 weeks!"

w.t.f. why would you go somewhere and eat in the same place every single night? even on an all-inclusive, you'd go out somewhere else for a change! there were lovely local bars and restaurants about 5 minutes away! ack!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 10:16, 2 replies)

someone I
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 10:28, closed)

Y'know, for someone relatively well off, you do appear to go on some awful holidays

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 10:36, closed)

money doesn't stop people from being idiots

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 10:45, closed)

you live in coventry
you can't comment on anywhere else, ever.

but for the record, it wasn't remotely awful. it was a lovely villa with its own garden and pool, but in a little cluster of such villas, amenities on site in case you had kids that needed entertaining. which we did, my brother selfishly having spawned 3 times.

i spent much of it lying in the hammock on the roof terrace, as the kids weren't allowed up there.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 10:47, closed)

you know that repeating the description in more detail doesn't make it sounds less awful, right?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 10:51, closed)

i have seen the things you like and dislike
your taste is abysmal and you should be shot through the neck at dawn
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 11:00, closed)

it's OK ... we're not judging you
you relax in your identikit hammock in could-be-anywhereville thinking you're better than the plebs in the cheaper identikit sun loungers down the road and I'll stick to actual travel.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 11:32, closed)

i like a bit of both
a bit of hammock and a bit of travel. i don't rule things out, judgey von holier than thou.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 11:36, closed)

'holier than thou' always seems an unfair criticism
it's not my fault I'm better than you ... why should I pretend we're equal just for the sake of smoother conversation?
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 11:37, closed)

but i don't think you'd find anyone who agrees you're better than they are
not even a scrofulous leper with a hole in his head
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 12:00, closed)

that's because you're all too thick to realise how thick you are

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 12:11, closed)

i know the word scrofulous
it's a great word
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 12:13, closed)

sadly you don't seem to know what it means or how to use it
scrofula is an archaic term for tuberculosis and since that is a much faster acting disease than leprosy, it doesn't make any real sense to be a scrofulous leper. If you are unfortunate enough to contract both diseases then you simply die of TB.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 12:42, closed)

i'll come to your funeral when you succumb, having caught both diseases from said scrofulous leper
i'll laugh and i may piss on the coffin, but i'll be there for you
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 12:51, closed)

You could contract leprosy first.

( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 12:52, closed)

ooh don't say that
what would he do if his fingers fell off? type with his toes?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 12:56, closed)

this thread is getting SEXY

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 12:57, closed)

simmer down stumpy

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 13:00, closed)

I'd agree that he's better than many people here.
Still look down on him, though.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 12:16, closed)

You're mocking someone for their repeated use of the resort's facilities,
then admitting to spending most of your time there in a hammock at the resort?
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 10:55, closed)

much of the time with the kids when they started bickering, aye
the rest of it was sight seeing. and afternoon tea at reids. fancy.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 11:00, closed)

Reids?
*googles*

So your excursions amounted to eating scones in a hotel, then?
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 11:12, closed)

no
finger sandwiches and scones and cakes. and champagne. with a beautiful view.

i don't get the hating. if you go on a family holiday with 9 of you, 3 of whom are kids, there are only so many options. it wouldn't be my first choice to go with friends/boyfriend/self, but for a family holiday, it rocked. madeira is seriously pretty.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 11:15, closed)

Your first mistake was to go on a holiday involving three kids.
Or any kids, come to think of it.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 11:21, closed)

well yes
i make that mistake all too frequently. fucking families :(
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 11:36, closed)

fucking families? didn't realise you were a royal

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 11:38, closed)

no, just from yorkshire

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Apr 2014, 12:00, closed)