This guy worked in a club up North
and reckoned, among other things:

- that he had played swingball in Pwllheli with Robert DeNiro
- that Gerry Adams wasn't really Irish and had to use an actor to do his voice on telly until he'd learned how to do it properly himself
- that he had a contact in China that allowed him to get mules easily
- that he'd slept with Bonnie Langford
- that he'd played on Centre Court at Wimbledon, despite being unseeded
- that Jackie Chan had phoned him up to ask about some paint

It's true! I saw it in a documentary, like.
( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Fri 14 Jan 2011, 16:25, 6 replies)

COMEDY GOLD!
- that Gerry Adams wasn't really Irish and had to use an actor to do his voice on telly until he'd learned how to do it properly himself
(waxdart hello., Fri 14 Jan 2011, 16:37, closed)

That last one
is fantastic.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Fri 14 Jan 2011, 16:39, closed)

that Gerry Adams wasn't really Irish and had to use an actor to do his voice on telly until he'd learned how to do it properly himself
this one is actually true
( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Fri 14 Jan 2011, 17:10, closed)

if you're going to lie about shagging a celebrity
why in the name of satan's sweaty ringpiece would you choose bonnie langford?
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 14 Jan 2011, 17:26, closed)

Everyone commenting on this does realise
it's a Phoenix Nights reference, don't they? Maybe not.

'Tis one of the best comedy bullshitters though.
(SnowyTheWereRabbit the Leporid from Hell, Fri 14 Jan 2011, 17:40, closed)

All hail Kenny Sr
King o' liars.
(rampants, Fri 14 Jan 2011, 19:28, closed)