I once worked in the Sky call centre in Dunfermline
the stories you hear are phenomenal.

Two of my favourites:

Call Centre Phone Jockey: Can I ask you what the weather is like where you are?
Customer: It's very cold and icy.
CCPJ: Ah, that's what your problem is - the dish is iced over. You need to warm it up. Can you get a bucket of hot water?

This guy had the customer leaning out of the window with a bucket of water, and throwing it over the dish.

And the other:

CCPJ: Right, that should be your account updated to include the Movie channels. I'm sending the information to your decoder now.
Cust: Okay. What do I need to do?
CCPJ: GET OUT OF THE ROOM RIGHT NOW! BEFORE THE RAYS GET YOU!
Cust: *sounds of a phone being dropped, footsteps and a door slamming*

To be honest, I actually doubt these are both true, but I would love to think they were....
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 3 Sep 2009, 12:28, 13 replies)

I'd love it
if the second one were true.
(Spidge New sig needed, donations gratefully accepted., Thu 3 Sep 2009, 12:46, closed)

Whenever I call that call centre, the people are lovely.
I would love to be a Murdoch hater but SKY is just an ace, albeit an expensive, product.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 12:48, closed)

Everybody I worked with there was lovely
As far as I remember (and this was quite a while ago) there were two big call centres, and both were in Scotland. Apparently the Scottish accent is the nicest one to hear over the phone.

Personally I think it's an Irish one, which is probably why there are now wheens of call centres in Ireland.

I feel really bad when I get an Indian accent on the phone because I *genuinely* can't understand them, but I feel all squirmy and uncomfortable saying so, because it makes me sound like a right racist BNP whore.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 3 Sep 2009, 12:57, closed)

There seem to be two groups of people who have worked at that call centre - the first group seem to have liked their time there and loved all the people that they worked with, the other group seem to have loathed every second.
Most people I know who worked there fall under the second group, you seem to have been a bit luckier.


To the best of my knowledge there are three big Sky call centres in Scotland - Dunfermline, Livingstone and one near Falkirk (I think).
(Pope Jamiroquai III, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 16:27, closed)

No, I hated the job
but they put you in groups of six to train, and you pretty much stay with your little group for the whole time you are there. My group was lovely. All women, mostly the same age as me (early 20s at the time) and we had some good breaks & lunches together.

To be fair, once I had finished my training, I lasted about three weeks before I was 'let go' - (I was an agancy worker and they didn't have to actually sack me) - I think it was more to do with the fact that I didn't get through 50 calls an hour, though.

And I can't hold a conversation whilst typing something completely different at the same time...
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 3 Sep 2009, 17:55, closed)

You got further than me then...
...I never even managed to start working for them.

Got through the interview stage just fine but a start date was not forthcoming, so I ended up giving up and getting a different job (which, in retrospect, is probably worse but I enjoy more).

Finally, about 6 months after the interview, they rang me and offered me a start date.
Except, I didn't answer so they left a voicemail. So I put in precisely the same amount of effort as they had when I'd been ringing them and deleted the voicemail.
(Pope Jamiroquai III, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 21:41, closed)

Only had to deal with them once
To cancel my "free for 4 months" subscription.
Spent about 1 minute cancelling, then another 10 chatting about hobbies, etc.
Really nice guy - obviously not on a calls/hour salary!
(Kliper Filllets Getting noticed by twats on the internet since, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 12:16, closed)

Sky is the worst company I have ever had to deal with
that is all
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 12:53, closed)

I take it
you never had to deal with NTL.

Fanny batter of the anchoviest kind.
(magic the cat will someone please think of the kittens, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 13:01, closed)

or NT Hell as they're generally known

( rofl harris, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 13:06, closed)

I havent
I have heard that NTL are bad, also Virgin Media, AOL...basically any technology service provider.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 14:08, closed)

I had NTL for 3 years in cardiff
never once had a problem with dealing with them. Have had Virgin for 2 years. Never a problem with them either.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 10:45, closed)

Maybe...
that's what killed Rod Hull...stupid instructions from bored Sky workers. YOU KILLED EMU MAN!
( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 12:56, closed)