About an hour ago...
I was walking to work along the river in the sunshine, happy in my Sufjan Stevens filled world. One of the many joggers which run along the Thames was coming towards me. I glanced at him, and he was nothing out of the ordinary - clad in lycra, late 20s/ early 30s chap. Not that bad looking if you are so inclined.

Then something bizarre happened. He glanced at me, and as he looked away started imitating a sexual act using his index and middle fingers and his tongue. It wasn't even subtle (although how can you be?), but he was really waggling and flailing his tongue around. Wouldn't be surprised if some dribble escaped too.

His facial expression didn't even change, and he didn't slow down. Just carried on jogging along.

I didn't even have time to register it until a few moments after, as it happended so quick. I mean did that really fucking happen?! And what does it meeeeeeeeean?!

Now i'm gay, and so it made me paranoid for some reason. I looked down at myself. Am I wearing my "I love my girlfriend" t shirt?* Nope. Did my flatmate scrawl "Lezza" on my forehead whilst I slept last night? Probably not. I mean, how does he know?? I have long hair AND I wear make up!!**

Or perhaps he's not taunting me about my sexual orientation, perhaps the male flirting has evolved from a smile and wave, to frantic gestures of simulated cunniligus.

Either way, it creeped me out and tainted the song which I was enjoying listening to. It was one of my favourites too. The bastard.


*No such t shirt exists in my wardrobe
**I jest, I jest
( awayfromthenumbers, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 9:35, 7 replies)

maybe he was thinking he wanted to do the index and middle finger thing with you?

(maggotriddendirtbox fast, feral and sharp as a tack since, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 9:42, closed)

maybe does it
to every woman he runs past.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 9:50, closed)

or man

(maggotriddendirtbox fast, feral and sharp as a tack since, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 10:51, closed)

Me thinks
the profile says otherwise.
( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 10:55, closed)

respectively
the jogger could swing both ways
(maggotriddendirtbox fast, feral and sharp as a tack since, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 11:03, closed)

True

( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 11:05, closed)

A woman?
On the internet? Shocking.
( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 10:41, closed)