.
my biggest disappointment?

Last weekend: Saturday 28/6/08 to be precise. Saturday @ 10.45am to be even more precise.

It was the day I met the new boyfriend of the girl I have been chasing for the better part of two years.

The girl I held while she was crying when her mate comitted suicide.

The girl that helped me through one of the worst periods of my life after the death of a loved one.

The girl who is my best friends' sister.

The girl who knows full well how I feel about her.

The girl who is the first thing on my mind when I wake up, and the last think I think of at night before I sleep

The girl who (while drunk- no excuse) hugged me on Saturday night, and asked me to tell her I love her while slow dancing. And stupidly, I did.

So, my biggest disappointment? Me. For being so stupid, I guess.
(drain_bamaged, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 11:34, 22 replies)

Betcha he isnt half as good to her as you are either
Proof irrefutable fo the, "treat 'em mean..." theory. Dude, that shit will happen to you again and again with women as long as you act like their doormat/punchbag/consolation hug when they have nowhere else to turn.

Maybe, one day in the future when she's been fucked around enough times by arseholes, she may come crawling back but even then it's a toss-up between her finally actually copping the fuck on or just using you until the next arsehole presents himself.

Run a fucking mile (twice today I've given this advice. Cynical about women? ME? Never!) :)

EDIT: Shame on me for having to edit 'advise' to 'advice' - still did it before anyone mentioned it though.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 11:40, closed)

.
I would love to run a mile. and more. and then take a plane. But shes my best mates sister (i know...I know...) which just makes this alot fucking harder.

you're right, I know you're right, just try telling that to my heart, instead of my head!

Daz
(drain_bamaged, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 11:43, closed)

I'm very sorry
for you. Wish I could help.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 1 Jul 2008, 11:48, closed)

heart, schmeart - dont be such a fucking girl
It's for your own good, my brother! Go out and get laid and/or drunk. Do something, anything, learn a trade, a new skill and above all, stay distracted from your stupid feelings. Chances are you will meet someone worth a damn when you least expect it.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 11:48, closed)

I've had her, she was rubbish

( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 11:50, closed)

chuckles @ Gilgamesh
Now, THAT's the right attitude.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 11:53, closed)

.
baz- that actually brought a smile to my face! I'm making plans to go out to Reflex (in croydon, if any of you are interested) to get right royally hammered!
(drain_bamaged, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 11:54, closed)

@Daz - like my homie Tone Loc say...
"sounds like a muthafuckin' plan to me"

I'll charter a Lear jet from the west of Ireland and see you in a couple of hours (not really) - ENJOY!!!
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 11:56, closed)

You've got serious one-itus
Go out, pull a girl right in front of her, build a bit of jelousy, don't act like you want this girl any more, and she'll be a lot more interested. Follow everyone's advice and run. If she chases, she'll be worth it.

Dangle string in front of a cat and it'll go mental trying to chase it. Give the cat the string and it'll get bored and lick it's parts. You're the string, dangle in front of the girl, but as soon as you make it easy for her, she'll be bored.


edit\ If you find her getting bored and licking her own parts then forget it mate, you're redundant!
( Moonraker isn't the droid you were looking for, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 12:08, closed)

.
that is one of the best fucking analogys' I have ever read!

you lot really are quite lovely, arent ya!
(drain_bamaged, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 12:10, closed)

bazmorningstar
Dude, not all women are like this, just the silly masochistic ones. And plenty of men seem to chase solely after bitches too, it ain't just a girl thing.
(grandmasterfluffles Come to my Armageddon party on, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 12:13, closed)

@grandmasterfluffles
agreed, but in this example...
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 12:14, closed)

stop being so understanding to women!
she'll start seeing you as the big sister she always wanted and, before you know it, people will be convinced that you are gay. go out and shag lots.
remember, if it moves, fuck it.
if it doesn't move, fuck it till it does.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 12:18, closed)

@bazmorningstar
Agreed. She is either evilly manipulative or batshit mental, but either way, bad news.

Actually, I think the best course of action would probably be to refuse to play games - sit her down, tell her straight how you feel and that you won't put up with her messing you around like that. And walk away if she continues such behaviour.
(grandmasterfluffles Come to my Armageddon party on, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 12:23, closed)

wow
you have got it bad.

Its no-ones fault, and she may well be amazing. See the string, Be the string.

Sounds like something that if you do it with some sensitivity - if it doesn't work out now this could be one for 20 years time...

...you know, that future meeting when you both can get yourselves together. Always keep things in such a way it it doesn't preclude this and enjoy your life and other women as is your want!
( bazza van der trance , ooh baby baby, baby baby. Get up on this., Tue 1 Jul 2008, 12:23, closed)

@grandmasterfluffles
Best possible outcome to that approach is she will apologise, all will be fine for a while then she'll do it again. Worst possible outcome is she never talks to him again (not necessarily a bad thing).
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 12:25, closed)

@drain
I always end up in these situations too. You need to sever contact. It hurts like fuck in the short term, but it's the only way to save your sanity.

On a more flippant note, best way to get over your best mate's sister? Shag his Mum!
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 12:30, closed)

@Boss
Probably not the best solution, but probably the most fun.

At least you'll have the ultimate comeback should you and your mate have an argument- yeah well, I've had your mum. and she were shit!
( Moonraker isn't the droid you were looking for, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 12:32, closed)

Been There, Done That
It doesn't get any easier with time, I'm afraid, it just seems as if the feelings get fainter. Like standing on the back of the ferry watching Holyhead pier disappear.

If you want to get the feeling you're not alone why not read this post - rather lengthy I'm afraid. The pic at the bottom is b0rked but can be seen here instead.
( Amos E Wolfe makes vinyl signs and things like that, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 13:28, closed)

If it's any help......
I had this once...

Chased a girl from 19 to 24, I was so in love. She was cute, short, blonde, fit, sexy, and we got on well. She'd secretly snog me when we were out and her boyfriend wasn't there, tell me we'd have our chance one day, etc etc etc.

Anyway, eventually, nearly 6 years after we first met, I got her! Yes, I had the woman I'd dreamed about.






But of course I didn't. she was a tosser. No sex (really), no love, no emotional commitment, no nothing. Just a few empty years of headbutting a doomed relationship with no redeeming features, and when it (amicably) ended she cut all contact with me because she then found someone else who would do her diy and had more money.

Luckily I'd already been humping her replacement for a little while - someone who 3 years before I'd never have even considered (she's pretty, not considered for other reasons :-p), and now we're getting a place together.

My point is, don't waste your life. There are loads of women out there, and if you think not getting this one is a disappointment, it could be nothing to the disappointment of actually managing it.

Don't chase happiness, cos when you do, one day you'll look back and see you spent years running straight past it.


However, if you get a chance, at least shag it so you can keep yourself in wanks over the years.


Just my 2 pence worth.

ps: My ex is fat now, with a bit of a tash, and well past 30. New girlfriend? 20 yrs old, blond, size 12, 32G entertainment centres, and bloody lovely. This last bit is just in case she ever reads it.
(NoveltyCondomHead Clanks Wams., Tue 1 Jul 2008, 14:09, closed)

1st post go me
don't give up hope m8 i met a lass quite a long time ago n just became her friend even tho i saw her n my heart skipped a beat.

Her boyfrend didn't particularly appreciate the freiendship even tho i didn't have any dishonourable intentions, she wos just a real gud frend hu everytime i saw her took my breath away.
said boyfrend decided to jump me wid 3 of his m8s in a pub, I broke his nose and jaw n dislocated 1 of his m8s shoulders while myself retaining 100hp(I do mixed martial arts).

cue a long time of pointless relationships wid pretty grls durin which i had no intention of makin a move on the 1 that was always on my mind so to speak and one day she fones me up and says; look i havnt bin able to stop thinkin about u since i met u n its drivin me crazy, ive dumpd so-and-so 4 a chance wid u. u wana go owt sumtime.

fukin A best news i eva had
(WilsonAlmighty, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 18:11, closed)

Friend-zone alert!
If you act like her girlfriend, then that's all you'll ever be.

Act like her boyfriend and (although it might be too late for that now) she'll start to see you that way.

It's bloody obvious really.

Although, I think you are already in the 'friend zone' - once in, you can never escape.

A bit like the Hotel California.
(dchurch bah, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 13:38, closed)