Alan Price - the cost of fame?
Many years ago, whilst in the darkest depths of Oldham studying Theatre Lighting, I had the pleasure of escaping for a whole month from the dreadful mill town, under the guise of "Work Experience". Taking the opportunity by the balls I ran as far away as possible to a small provincial, council run venue, where flat caps, pigeon fancying and ferrets had not been heard of, and had a great time. That is until the third week of my stay. Alan Price, Keyboardist from the Animals (famous for such great tracks as House of the Rising Sun) was on a comeback tour, and was due to visit this lowly playhouse that I had become fond of (anything was preferential to returning back "Oop North"). Many other acts had remarked on Mr. Price and his reputation, having worked in other similar venues straight after him on their respective travels, and said that he was hell to work with. I was not to be put off, and when asked if I fancied running the lights for his concert on my own, I felt on cloud nine - this was to be one of my first ever Pro Concert Lighting jobs, and to work with such a top name was a privilege. How was I to know that the resident Techie, my mentor, was taking the opportunity of having a niave student to keep well out the way of what was going to be an extremely tough night?

The big night arrives, and with it, so does Alan's roadies, and all the gear. But no sign of the headline act himself. His (probably very underpaid) minions set everything up, and I do the same in the lighting box with my tube of Pringles and bottle of Irn Bru... when suddenly from out of the darkness of the wings, and out onto the stage, sweeps the King of Keys, Alan Price... with the opening lines that will remain with me for a long time - "That Keyboard is set at the wrong height, how the F@&£ am I supposed to play that?!?" and storms of stage left, leaving the poor roadies to guess if it was too high or too low. (yes, I know they should know what height to set up the Star's keyboard, but a small amount of politeness normally brings respect... something that I doubt his entouurage had much of for him).

Ten minutes later sees me stood backstage after being summoned to see the man who had already gone down a little in my estimation. He storms up to me (probably still in a foul mood) and exclaims "Your the lighting guy?" (Note no introduction... he probably hasn't got time to remember my name after all) "Just remember, It's MY name on the poster and it's ME they've come to see, so I don't care what you do with the lighting tonight, but as I am the Star of the Show - THERE WILL ALWAYS BE A LIGHT ON ME!" I nod and think 'what an arrogant little tool' as he continues - "Even if you go to blackout".

Well they taught us many things in my first 18 months at college, including the definition of a blackout, but sadly I must have missed the part of the course that instructed us how to talk to jumped up Muso's that hadn't had a hit outside of Greece for two decades, so now being devoid of any feeling of awe towards this organ-ist I replied, "Well, I don't know where you studied Stage Lighting, but it would be extremely difficult to go to Blackout if there is still a light on you... once you've decided which it is, I'll be in the lighting box" and walked off leaving him looking like Simon Smith's pet, and a couple of his roadies grinning like Cheshire cats.

I never did find out what he preferred, and have never listened to H-o-t-R-S since.

Apologies for length, but it's shorter than his concert...which should have been cut short at the first note.

Be kind to me I'm a newbie (after lurking and laughing for about 12 months)
(Nozirrah turned left instead of right and ended up here on, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 8:39, 3 replies)

Oldham
Oh come on, be fair. I have it on good authority (another escapee) that Oldham is proudly known as "The Home Of The Tubular Bandage". How could you not mention that?
( electric_goat, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 8:59, closed)

i was taught to always light the money
but if he was worth a fuck he'd be aware that techs are what makes the show happen and it makes sense to stay on our side , i trust you lit the show to the best of your ability
( horace wimp needs more than 49 characters to fully express hi, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 9:36, closed)

He drinks in 'The Sun' in Barnes...
...dull old fucker.
(Billy The Fish wants to gargle with Lucy Pinder's bath water, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 13:20, closed)